3 Ways To Stop Complacency From Ruining The Relationship You're Used To

by Tyler Leslie

Complacency is a huge problem in relationships nowadays.

Most people don’t see it because it disguises itself in the form of contentedness and comfortability.

If you're not paying attention, complacency will sneak into your relationship and quickly ruin all the time and effort you have put in.

Complacency is the beginning of the end.

It’s like running on auto-pilot.

You're only doing enough to maintain what you have with your partner, and you’re not pushing yourself or your relationship to become better or stronger.

Eventually, your partner will start feeling like he or she isn’t getting enough attention or that you don’t care, even though that may not be the case.

We all get complacent at some point, and becoming aware of when you slip is vital to the success of a loving, growing and fulfilling partnership.

Here are three practical ways to stop complacency from ruining your relationship:

1. Set relationship goals with your partner.

For a great relationship to be loving, exciting, fun and fulfilling, I strongly believe those involved need to have clear and set goals around what they desire out of their relationship.

Just like career, health or financial goals we set for ourselves, our relationship goals need to be just as important.

A lot of us jump into relationships with a vague idea of what we want out of them, and that’s where most of the issues start.

Without a clear understanding of where the both of you are headed, you tend to just go through the motions of everyday life, and you ultimately become bored and complacent with each other.

I have certainly had my fair share of this in previous relationships, and I don’t wish that feeling of unhappiness upon anyone.

A way to avoid becoming too comfortable and complacent in your relationship is to set weekly, monthly and yearly goals.

My partner and I set aside one hour every Sunday to sit down and review and set our relationship goals.

We review previous goals we've attained (go for a weekend away, surprise each other unexpectedly sometime that week, review our budget), and set new goals to keep moving forward and to keep growing.

There's nothing more satisfying and healthy for your relationship than ticking off goals together.

2. Shake up your routine with your partner.

Although having a routine is important, if you don’t shake up your routine once in a while, you'll start to bore your partner.

It'll suck the excitement out of your relationship very quickly.

I’ve learned that keeping that sense of adventure will help to keep your relationship exciting, and the interest at an all-time high.

I started with small changes to my routine that were as simple as trying new restaurants on our date nights.

Another small change I made was cooking for my partner a few times a week.

She usually does most of the cooking, and I wanted to take some of the responsibilities off her shoulders.

Whatever it may be, whether it's in your intimate time with your partner, or it's something in your daily life that you can do when you get home from work, shaking up your routine can be very beneficial for the relationship.

3. Never stop learning how to be better to your partner.

Learning to be better to your partner is crucial to keeping your relationship strong.

I’ve learned how important it is to constantly keep learning how to please your partner in every way possible.

Making my partner have a sense of bliss is something I can always strive for.

In relationships, you can always do something better.

Sitting down with my partner once a week was a good way to start.

We sit down and discuss our likes and dislikes, and we find out what gives each other that buzz that keeps our happiness levels on high.

We would also write everything down as we were discussing it. That way, we could always refer back to it.

Another thing we like to do is read positive material that relates to relationships. You can find some great books or articles online with amazing advice.

From my experience, learning how to be a better person to my partner every single day has kept complacency completely out from our relationship.

Complacency is very important to pay attention to in your relationship. It can tear it apart faster than you could ever imagine.

Setting relationship goals, shaking up your routine and continuing to learn how to be better in your relationship will keep complacency at a distance, and it will help you build a long-lasting relationship.