10 Signs It's Time To Have The 'What Are We Talk?' With Your New Bae

by Nicole Riley Banner

What are we? I don't know. I can't explain it to you.

I can't explain it to my friends. I can't even explain it to myself because I honestly have no idea. Are we hooking up, or are we dating? I am too scared to ask you because I know you're terrified of the word "dating." I won't ever ask, especially since you said we're are just having fun, right?

Before you even mention the touchy subject of your destiny as a couple, you must first consider where you want the relationship to go. Here are the things you have to consider before having “the talk”:

1. If you want answers, you have to ask questions.

It is terrifying to put yourself out there, but it's better to come off as crazy than to be strung along. When you develop feelings for someone, the worst thing you can do is hold back too much. If you like the person, tell him or her.

2. Don't play the game.

Once you start playing games in a relationship, you're dealing with a child. It's not supposed to be a game of "who cares less." If you like someone, prove it.

3. You can't stop thinking about the person.

Telling your someone you can't get him or her off your mind isn't bad. Maybe the person doesn't think about you at all, but if he or she does, it's time to have the talk about what you mean to the person.

4. You need equal effort.

It's OK if you started the conversation the last few times, as long as the other person also sometimes does. To be in a healthy relationship, you must give equal attention to one another.

Once the feelings are mutual, you can be forward with your partner.

5. It's driving you crazy.

You can't think straight. You don't know if you're friends. Sometimes, you are more than friends. Sometimes, you are nothing but a stranger to the person.

If you are upset about not knowing, you have nothing to lose by asking. If you feel this way about someone already, you have either already lost him or her, or the person doesn't plan on pursing you.

6. Is it time to let the person go?

If he or she is ignoring you, let it be. If the person wants to see you, he or she will make an effort.

Your life will go on with or without this person. Remember your value.

7. You're sleeping together.

Obviously, you aren't going to go from "single" to "in a relationship" overnight. But if you're continuously sleeping with someone on the regular, you two are dating, whether you choose to admit it or not.

8. Can you travel together?

This is the best way to see if you can spend an extended period of time with your partner. If you can't, that's a good sign to avoid the talk. You both clearly aren't ready to fully commit.

9. You go to family functions.

You've met the parents, and they see you all the time. He or she has brought you around and is frequently showing you off. When you're basically part of the family, you definitely need to have the talk.

10. Stop making it complicated.

You either have feelings, or you don't. There is no in-between. Keep it simple.

The biggest factor that affects relationships is communication. Respect one another, and communicate how you feel.

It's not easy to know when the right time is, but these are some good indicators that suggest you need to talk to him or her. Communication is the key to a healthy relationship, and the feeling of not knowing where you stand with someone is worse than the disappointment that might arise from the talk.