Relationships

This One Thing Guys Do Is Absolutely Ruining Your Chance At An Orgasm

by Candice Jalili
Simon Becchetti

THIS JUST IN.

On top of your subpar salary, your inability to feel safe walking home after a couple of drinks and that nagging feeling of constant objectification, sexism is apparently also now playing a role in your less-than-stellar sex life.

Yes, that's right. Sexism is ruining your chance at an orgasm.

There are a couple of different types of sexism. There's the super serious kind, aggressive sexism, that propels rape culture and blurs lines when it comes to consent. That one is horrific in its own right for reasons that should be obvious. Then there is another kind that's not quite as serious.

"Benevolent sexism" is the kind of sexism that we sort of let slide because it doesn't seem too harmful. It's the kind of sexism that's behind the whole "damsel in distress" concept. The kind that makes men want to protect and take care of women. And a recent study found that this kind of sexism is actually ruining your sex life.

So how is benevolent sexism messing with your sex life? Well, when a woman internalizes it and accepts her role as the more passive and weak member of the heterosexual relationship, she ends up choosing more dominant partners who hold the same ideals and tend to, in turn, be more selfish partners in bed.

Women who rejected these ideals and, thus, didn't feel the need to be more passive in the bedroom had far more satisfying sex lives. Not only were they more likely to achieve orgasm, but they were also less likely to perceive their partners as sexually selfish.

So, what's the silver lining here? You can fix the benevolent sexism that's ruining your sex life by accepting the fact that you are NOT a damsel in distress and you DON'T need to be passive in the bedroom (or anywhere else).

Choose a partner who accepts the same ideals. When all the dweebs who still believe they need to "save" us stop getting any action, they'll get the picture.

Citations: On the Link Between Benevolent Sexism and Orgasm Frequency in Heterosexual Women (PubMed.gov), Here's how sexism is wrecking your orgasms (Metro)