Relationships

Why Being A Saint And A Sinner Is The Most Desirable Trait In A Woman

by Lauren F.
Stocksy

A woman who has found the happy medium between being both a sinner and a saint is hard to find. Obtaining these two qualities is not a lesson learned over time with experience, but rather, it is an acquired attribute, developed depending on one’s own persona. People can change over time, however. Maybe you grow into your own and acquire another side to you as you age.

Think of the combination of sinner and saint as the sexy librarian, or the too-smart-for-her-own-good stripper. It’s the best of both worlds. Of course a man is going to be turned on by a woman who combines smarts and sex into one perfect package.

It’s like finishing your doctoral degree and going home to celebrate by having sex with your tease of a girlfriend. See what I’m getting at? If you have the brains, which elicits a mental boner for men, and you can also put in work in the bedroom, double score.

No one likes boring and unoriginal! It lacks excitement and leaves little to the imagination or anticipation. The combination of these two traits is a dominant feature in any woman. Let’s break it down a little further:

The Independent, Strong-Willed Saint

To be truly dedicated to work, to be fully invested in family and friends, and to have ambitions and goals for the future showcases just how devoted women in Generation-Y are to being independent. We do everything we can to debunk any classification as lazy, we strive to perform to the best of our abilities in the office to stay on a level playing field with men, and we sure as hell need no man who does not need us.

Showing men that we are independent and strong gives off the impression that we aren’t the needy, so-called clingers, always having to rely on them for reinforcement and support. When we ask for a man’s opinion or assistance, we keep it to a minimum, if not just to let him know that he value his opinion. Being strong-willed and independent leaves us open-minded to inviting a man into our lives and finally letting our guards down.

We women also make mistakes -- we are humans, after all. It’s in our nature to screw up once in a while. Making mistakes makes us honest; it makes us real. Every woman has unique, individual qualities and talents, and inside of each of us lays perfectly imperfect flaws, which define us and separate us from one another.

I questioned many men concerning this topic and the majority believed all of these qualities to make women approachable. These independent characteristics and the ability to stand alone without fear is what encourages men to label us as ‘future wife status,’ the ones that can hold a relationship together and someday maybe a family.

These qualities insinuate that a woman has her life figured out and she doesn’t need anyone else to figure sh*t out for her. She can stand alone, or she can stand with a man, and either way, she is perfectly happy.

The Sexy Sinner

What makes a woman stand out in addition to the qualities of an independent, however, is the other side of her. You know, the sexy, mysterious side of a woman that men fantasize over -- the naughty side.

Sure, a woman might have it all together with her college degree, subsequent job, ability to pay her own bills, maintain car insurance, etc.; but, without the aspect of lust and desire, a man can quickly lose interest over the lack of sexual stimulation.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but is it not true that men grow weary of the same, unoriginal, lackluster performance in the bedroom? Like women, men seek more than the same, monotonous sex routine every night.

Feel like you’ve lost your touch? Feel like you can’t get him as aroused as you used to? Like I said before, people are capable of changing. Make a change to spice things up and get in touch with your sinner side. If you head off to work at the hospital in your usual scrubs, return home wearing nothing but a pea coat.

Unexpected changes in routine such as that are certain to get your man excited again. Instead of blowing off the alarm clock at 6 am, blow your man to wake him up in the best way he can start his day. Instead of asking to have cheesecake for dessert, ask him to take you home and have you. You get the point.

Spontaneity is key to maintaining a healthy relationship. If you’ve totally lost touch with your sinner side, or if it’s completely new to you, it will take effort; however, the results will take you by pleasant surprise in the end. The benefits this change reaps for your relationship will make you think twice about ever returning to your purely self-sufficient and innocent saint self.

I have been in several relationships, in which I have always been a caring and loving individual to those whom I’ve spent a significant amount of time dedicating myself to. When it comes to performing in the bedroom with anyone I date, well, I'm a different person than I am outside of the bedroom.

Because of my change in character to keep sex enticing and stimulating for both of us, my relationships have maintained strength in that area. I, of course, maintain my appropriately casual and/or professional demeanor in any given outside environment, but behind closed doors, I am whomever I choose to be.

The spontaneity of a relationship and a woman’s ability for her to leave some aspect of herself to the imagination are what keeps a man coming back for more. Men live for the unexpected, for the temptation of something new. When it comes to his woman, a man cherishes the sides of her that no other man is blessed to see.

Consider this: When a man sees an attractive woman on the street, he imagines what it would be like to have sex with her. If she’s a stranger to his bed, he has no idea who she is behind the closed doors of the bedroom. Thus, if you are in the bedroom as you are outside of the bedroom, your man will essentially lose any sexual fantasies he may have previously conceived before having you; your outside self and your bedroom self are one in the same.

So, what’s the lesson here, ladies? Turn it on! Lose all of your inhibitions and get in touch with your sexuality. You’re not doing yourself or your partner a favor by keeping it totally pure and simple, you sweet saint. Go ahead, it’s okay to be a sexy sinner.

The Beautiful, Blissful Combination Of Sinner And Saint

So, you go, girl. Continue to be proficient at work, to be the caring and loving person you are to your friends and family, and to be 100 percent yourself. There is a man out there who will appreciate you for you, in all of your flaws and perfections.

If you feel more confident with your bad girl self than ever, power to you! However, if want to reach out of your comfort zone, why wait? Now is the time to experiment. If you feel you’ve lost touch with your inner sinner, dig deep and get to know her better. Now is the time to not only surprise your man, but also yourself.

Stop restricting yourself to your mundane, monotonous life routine. Forget complacency. Masturbate; learn what you like. Then masturbate while he touches you and show him how you want it from now on. Take yourself by surprise; feel yourself out – literally. Take your man by surprise, too.

For once, if not for the first time, take charge. Dominate not only in the workplace, but also the bedroom. Take initiative and take control, ladies; it’s what we do!

Top Photo Credit: Tumblr