Rebound relationships and no-frills sex may seem like obligatory recovery steps in the wake of a breakup, but what about rebounding with your ex? I have found that it is pretty common to ricochet back into a sexual relationship with a former lover rather than to start fresh with a new partner.
What draws us to this person who has caused so much pain rather than to a potentially good guy with whom we have no history? Why do we habitually come back for more if we know it’s not what we want? Is it the sex or is it a deeper feeling?
Sex with someone you love can be difficult to describe — his body seems to fit your body like a glove and he knows everything about your existence.
The touch of his skin on your skin is not only sensual, but also comforting. He doesn’t care that you are between waxes or that your panties don’t match your bra — you’re no longer self-conscious.
There is a feeling that comes with sex when you are deeply in love: butterflies, fireworks, going down the big rollercoaster hill — it’s incomparable to anything else and can be difficult to imagine ever coming across it again.
This type of sex, as opposed to a one-night stand or a two-week fling, can make a woman feel truly beautiful and loved, not just sexy and lusted after. There are a few key factors as to why a woman looks to the person she was in love with for satisfaction, despite her current relationsh*t (sorry, I mean relationship) status.
Women can easily fall into the traps of the “I miss you" and "I'll love you forever" texts from an ex. Mix those with a few drinks, loneliness, nostalgia and perhaps guilt for ignoring an ex’s consistent efforts and you have a complete recipe for a past love rebound.
You’ll pick up your cracked iPhone, text him your location and allow him to come get you. You’ll share some laughs, tears and trysts before you bid him adieu. You may forget why you are even broken up.
Was it the tired whisper of an "I love you" that possessed you to bounce back into bed with your ex, or was it the six vodka tonics and who knows how many shots? Now is the time for you to make the decision of whether or not to continue with the ex or find a nice, innocent rebound from some EDM-blasting nightclub, who may suck at life, but will provide great sex.
While yes, rebound sex with an ex can be instantly gratifying, it can also give you dating amnesia. Whether your rebound is strictly sex on weekends after dancing until 4 am with your gal pals or frequent hangouts that lead to fornication, our minds become foggy and forgetful when push comes to shove.
Maybe you’re addicted to irrevocably loving someone who cannot give you what we need and above all, deserve, yet you continue down this road of reckless behavior, which can (and will) inevitably end.
All of a sudden, you are re-breaking up with your ex because realize he is still the same ‘ole dog. He still doesn’t your return your calls, he still picks the fellas over you and he still texts some girl named Brittney, who he claims is just a friend.
Rebound sex with an ex can teach you an invaluable lesson: one night, or in most cases, many nights of pure bliss with a past love cannot erase all of the pain and wrongdoing.
Your relationship ended for a reason, right? So, is rebound sex with your ex healthy? It may provide you with some short-term pleasure and a sense of closure, but it may also deter you from the path of healing. But ultimately, do what is best for you and your happiness.
Top Photo Courtesy: We Heart It