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How To Take A Vagina Picture Without Worrying It's Too Awkward

Dick pics are a dime a dozen (unsolicited or otherwise). You can't throw an iPhone without hitting one. More rare, and therefore more awesome, is the illusive vagina pic. They are less common in part because knowing how to take a vagina picture can be a tough skill to mater, but also because of the way folks are socialized to be ashamed of their vaginas, says Lola Jean, sex educator and mental health professional. "Societally speaking, we’re taught that the vagina is more of a shameful area. The way it smells, tastes, looks, or the state of pubic hair. Those with vaginas are socialized to be shameful of them so there’s little reason for those to be 'showing them off' in such a way," she tells Elite Daily.

Here's the thing: Your V is amazing, and totally worthy of being shown off — that is, if you so desire. But if you decide you want to take that special selfie, you probably want it to look amazing, which means you're going to want to know your angles.

I'm a firm believer that there is no wrong way to have a vagina, but there may be wrong ways to take a vagina picture. Truthfully, whoever's the lucky recipient of the picture is probably not going to care… they'll just be so excited to get it at all. But if the aesthetics of it matter to you, I've compiled a list of the most common mistakes we make when taking photos south of the equator, to help you avoid these honey-pot pitfalls and feel confident when you hit send on that special delivery. So, here's what to avoid when the time comes to snap a pic of your perfect V.

1. Don't worry that it's not "pretty enough."

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Let's just get this out of the way right off the top: Your vagina is beautiful. Full stop. There's no wrong way to have a vagina. You don't hear dudes crying about their balls, do you? No, because the world hasn't told them they should. And that's just sexist bullsh*t. Reject that garbage and try not to internalize it.

The first step to taking a V-pic you love is to get comfortable with what your vulva and vagina look like, says Jean. “Grab a mirror, a light, or put your phone is selfie mode and get up close and personal with your junk. Just like the way to be more comfortable with your naked body is by spending more time with it, the way to become more comfortable with your vulva is to spend time looking at it," she explains. "I also find it's helpful to have a healthy relationship with other people's vulvas. In the times I’ve seen my friends or other people's genitals in my masturbation classes, you realize the wide variety of vulvas out there and how beautiful and special they all are.”

2. Mind your lighting.

Ask any photographer about the most important factor in getting a good shot and they will probably tell you it's all about the lighting. The same goes for vagina pics. Unless you're at the OBGYN, avoid harsh lights. Instead, look for soft natural light, or candle light, to really make a V-pic shine.

3. Think before including your face.

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Unless you relish the idea of your future employers, in-laws, religious leaders, the president of the PTA, and your mom seeing this pic, don't include your face in it. We live in an era of social media, Google, and revenge porn. So, while Jean says whether or not you include your face is entirely up to you, make sure you’ve given all the potential ramifications plenty of thought. “It’s safer to assume that any photo you send to someone is now out of your control. If you’re comfortable with a photo of your face and your genitals getting out there — more power to you. If you wanna stay safe with plausible deniability, why include your face?" advises Jean.

4. Don't forget to groom!

If going full bush is your speed, I am here for it. But you didn't go to school picture day without running a comb through your hair, did you? Same goes for photographing your V. If you shave or wax, do so. If you don't, take a few minutes to make sure your hair is in place.

5. Avoid the bathroom.

Things no one said ever: “Damn, that toilet is hot.” Bathroom selfies have become pretty standard because of mirrors and good lighting, but when it comes to snapping your vagina, change your location. If privacy is what you're after, the bedroom works just great. The bathroom, not so much.

6. Take several shots.

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If you're anything like me, your phone is probably full of selfie "photoshoots." Sure, when you post it on Instagram, it's like it was an effortless, single-shot miracle, but we know better. The same goes for when you're snapping the thunder down under. Maybe you're nervous and you just want to get it over with, so you take one and — bam — you're done. In this case, take your time, take a million shots, and narrow it down to your favorite. Delete the rest. Practice makes perfect!

7. Try different poses.

If this is your first time taking pics of your vagina, you may feel a little bit awkward. Here's the key: Try lots of different poses. Get creative and learn which angle you like best. Open, closed, doggy style, a brand new pose you invent… whatever you like best, the important part is to be creative and experiment. You may be surprised at which one speaks to you.

8. Taking photos you don't feel comfortable with.

While getting the right pose, lighting, and angle that best suits your anatomy is important, there is one other factor that trumps them all: the motivation behind the pic, and that it's something you want to do. “At the end of the day, you have to want to take a vulva selfie for someone,” says Jean. “If it has to do with your own issues of body confidence, that’s one thing. But if it’s more to do with fulfilling another desire where you wind up feeling used, it’s another thing. If someone is requesting this from you and you don’t want to fulfill it, this person is likely someone who will not respect your boundaries. Anyone who will shame or pressure you is someone who doesn’t deserve you,” she concludes.

That last point is probably the most important one. A V-pic that looks great is also one that makes you feel great. So, if this is something that you want to give a shot (pun intended), just relax and have fun with it.

This post was originally published on 9/14/17. It was updated on 8/15/19. Additional reporting by Rachel Shatto.