Why Society Can't Take Away My Desire To Get Married

Carousel Productions (II)

Dear men of the 21st century,

The world we live in now is tough.

Many people think we have it easy, with all kinds of technology and easy access to anything we can imagine. But the truth is, it has only complicated things.

With simplicity comes a test of responsibility. In this digitally dominated age, temptation is everywhere. It’s too easy to cheat, and the grass almost always looks greener somewhere else.

We get validation from superficial likes, comments, retweets, etc. We get bombarded by highly-edited photos, pretty words and only what people WANT you to see. We accept what we initially see as the truth.

The truth is, as technology has advanced, we have gotten weak, vulnerable, immoral and apathetic.

It’s hard to name a couple these days who hasn’t split, divorced or had affairs.

I’m proud to say I’m one of the rare people who truly doesn’t understand why that is. What happened to being able to love the person you promised God you’d stand by until death? I don’t plan on that changing.

So do me a favor, and don’t jeopardize that for me.

I’m a romantic, maybe old-fashioned. I’m not the girl the world has come to accept as typical. I won’t be reckless with another person's heart.

If I say I do, I will. If I give you my heart, I don’t want it back. It's yours to keep.

If you give me yours, I’ll guard it for dear life.

I love deep, sometimes so much that it hurts. But you’ll always be loved. I will want to share a life with you, but I’ll let you have a life of your own. I want you to love other things. I want you to be happy. I don’t need you to choose between what you love and who you love.

I will stand by you and support you until you tell me not to, and then I’ll stand behind you and support you even when you’re not looking. I don’t give up. I don’t walk away. I’ll give you space, but I won’t stop loving you.

We’ll fight, we’ll scream. I won’t like you all the time, but I will always love you.

All that being said, I may seem like an easy target for a man who wants a woman who will blindly trust and love him. I promise you, I am not.

Do not test me.

I am trusting and trustworthy, that is true. But I’ve come to know a liar when I see one. Those promises I made in those previous statements were not an open audition, a challenge or an admittance of vulnerability. They were directed toward one person, a person who will be able to respect my heart. Though he may break it at times unintentionally, he will always leave it whole.

Who that person is, I don’t know yet. He may not even exist anymore.

Call me unrealistic. Call me naive. Call me overly optimistic. But that’s who I’ll give my heart to.

I won’t settle for less.

I will never get divorced. That’s a huge statement, I know. But I’m a committed person. And I’ve committed to that. I’d rather spend the rest of my life loving only myself than loving a man whose heart isn’t completely mine.

I don’t want my children raised in two homes. I don’t want them raised cynical and hard-hearted, knowing nothing but conditional and temporary love. For me and for them, I’m begging the weak-hearted, disloyal men of this world to respect that and steer clear.

No offense meant here. If that’s the type of person you are, I’ll respect your life choices.

I’m just asking for you to do the same.

I know all too well that some women are just as guilty (if not more so) than some men of being disloyal and promiscuous.

I just can’t speak for them. I can only speak for myself.

I can’t guarantee much in life, but I can guarantee that will never be me.

Please, if you cannot truly commit and be loyal, just stay away from me. Do not waste our time or emotional energy. That's all I ask. It’s just not worth it.

So for all you men who love a good challenge, who think women are emotionally weak, indecisive and flaky, I hope you somehow find happiness.

But I can assure you, it will never be with me.


One of the last true romantics