9 Reasons Being Tied Down After Graduation Will Only Hold You Back
If I had a dollar for every time I heard or overheard a woman say, “I can’t believe an entire semester has gone by and I haven’t met a single guy,” I would be filthy rich.
PSA: This isn’t 1953; you don’t pay tuition to find a relationship.
That being said, I want to empower my fellow single lady college grads to revel in their singledom.
Just because you're single and alone after graduating from college (a huge accomplishment that should be validation enough that you're kickass), it doesn't mean you're on the straight and narrow path to dying alone.
Here are 10 reasons why it’s okay to be single after graduation:
1. It’s okay to be selfish and think about yourself.
Especially during your senior year.
You have more ahead of you than you may realize, and it’s time to focus on that.
Focus on you, and remember that you deserve the success you're being accoladed for when you take that march across the stage.
2. Relationships should never be a main priority, especially in your youth.
Not everyone is like that couple you know from high school who's is already engaged (and will probably be miserable in 10 years, so you already win).
Love has no rulebook or diagram.
There's no formula for the perfect relationship.
No couple is the same, and envy is a characteristic that will lead you down a misguided path to no man's land.
At our age and stage of living, it's easy to feel as if having a relationship should be a priority, but it really shouldn't.
Sure, it can add to our overall happiness, but a relationship should only be a happy addition to an already complete person, not a means of completing one's self.
Take this time to get to know the real you before committing to someone out of fear.
You'll find love, but only after learning to love yourself.
3. Dependability in any relationship is essential, but only to a degree.
I'll be the first to say it: Graduation is f*cking scary.
It’s normal to want someone to take with you when you leave this crazy world behind.
You want someone who gets it, someone who's in the same place as you are to make it all a little more understandable and bearable.
You need time to grow on your own in this crucial part of your life.
Finding yourself will feel a lot more rewarding when you do it without comparison.
4. Your life depends on no one but yourself.
Fight for what you want.
Have a life for yourself before deciding to share it with anyone else.
5. Love has no timeline.
There is no proper way to maintain a healthy relationship.
All people are different, further explaining why all couples are different.
A relationship is not an exam you can study for.
No matter how hard you try and keep it inside the box, love knows no bounds and will never let you decide when it arrives on your doorstep.
6. Youth is of the essence, and you’re younger than you think.
Listen to that professor you vibe with or your mother’s constant nagging.
You may be old compared to the 18-year-old freshman who just walked into the party you're currently raging at, but in the grand scheme of things, you're pretty much seen as a baby.
You have the world at your feet, and you're craving to explore.
Your 20s are a the time to be alive, and anything you’re worried about will be figured out with time.
7. College is a stepping-stone you never want to forget.
It’s where you grow beyond boundaries, it’s where you switch your major three times because you’re terrified of hating it down the road and it’s where you realize you want to move to Australia because that guy you met at the bar looked like he was an extra in "Blue Crush.
All of these decisions will bring you happiness, but only if you make them completely and entirely on your own.
Basing your decisions on anyone else’s will only lead to uncertainty.
Since college is such a formative time, it's vitally important to make decisions that will keep you safe, happy and at peace.
Keeping others in mind and at heart when making these decisions can be simply labeled as being a good person, but your final decision should only depend on your gut, not the requests of others.
You don't want to look back on your college years and feel remorse for not speaking for yourself, so make sure whatever you do, you're doing it for yourself.
8. A fragile process shouldn’t be rushed.
There is absolutely nothing wrong about wanting to be in a relationship, but timing is everything.
If you’re looking for love, you won’t find it in desperate times.
It’s beneficial for you and the growth of your future relationship to let time run its proper course.
Your life should flourish when you're in a new relationship, and it shouldn't cause any added stress.
9. Relationships do not define you or your path in life.
Prioritizing your time for yourself is necessary for a fulfilled lifestyle.
Never forget to be you.
Being someone you're not for the sake of someone else isn't love; it's manipulation.
Over the last four years, you've found your passion in life, and graduation is your cue to run with it.
When when you find someone as spontaneous as you are, you’ll feel like it’s worthwhile.