Relationships

What Your Last Breakup Says About The Type Of Dater You Are Now

by Dan Scotti

Relationships are supposed to change people – that's just the nature of the business.

For many people, relationships teach those involved valuable lessons about selflessness and thinking of another person first. For others, relationships have showed them the power of love and all the beautiful things that come with loving another person.

And then, for those less lucky, relationships can end disastrously. But, even when relationships come to a catastrophic end, they'll change those involved nonetheless.

In fact, most of the time, the way your previous relationship ended will often foreshadow how you'll approach future ones.

A lot of this has to do with the aspects of "trial and error," and much of this concept has to do with the underlying concepts of PTSD.

Either way, your past breakups can almost always reveal certain aspects of your personality that you might not have known about prior.

Here's what your past breakup says about the kind of dater you are.

If you got cheated on by your ex...

If you were cheated on, there’s a good chance you might still be a little, I don’t know, f*cked up.

You don’t trust anyone whatsoever – not even the weatherman – which is why you always carry around an umbrella, even when the forecast says sunny conditions.

You have an affinity for Drake and could swear that the majority of his songs were literally written about you and your situation.

You swear you’ll never get hurt in a relationship again, but, realistically, you’re emotionally unavailable – and, at this point, the possibility of any future relationships looks grim.

If YOU cheated on your ex...

As science tells us: once a cheater, always a cheater. If you were unfaithful to your significant other in a past relationship, well, chances are you’re preparing to cheat again and again, like how you keep forgetting to study.

You’re a liar – and a damn good one at that – although you’d never admit it. You’re a strong proponent of the “deny till you die” way of doing things, especially regarding your less-than-loyal habits.

You’ll typically deny until “the sh*t hits the fan.” Then you’ll just drunk text your ex for the next few months and make sure he or she doesn’t fully move on.

If you and your ex ended as friends...

You clearly still want to sleep with your ex, which is evident by the fact that you still “catch up over text” because you “care about him or her,” instead of moving on with your own life. That’s a given.

You have a problem ending things definitively, one way or the other – and would rather float around the world of “maybe,” as in “maybe we’ll get back together,” or “maybe we’ll sleep together when we’re mired in a sexual slump,” which, in your opinion, is simply keeping your options open.

Deep down, you’re not searching for a connection as much as you’re looking for companionship – or someone to hang out with on weeknights, realistically.

And when you don’t have a significant other to play this role, you’ll just call one of your former ones to fill in.

If you and your ex ended because of "circumstances...”

Maybe you broke up with your significant other because you had to leave for different colleges or were on different sides of the country.

Perhaps his or her new job didn’t really allow for “fair time” to be invested into a relationship. Perhaps you even tried doing the "long distance thing" for a little while.

Whatever the cause may have been, you ended your relationship because of a specific set of circumstances that didn’t allow for it to flourish – sort of like the whole “wrong place or time” type of idea.

Still, you have very optimistic feelings about “love” – and everything involved with it – as you never had your heart broken by a person but, instead, a situation.

For now, however, you try to only date people who live in your hometown or work in your office – to avoid any similar scenarios down the road.

If your parents hated your ex...

If your parents hated your ex, it’s probably because you’re a little rebellious. You like doing things – and people – that are more “against the grain” from what was once the norm in your household.

You smoke pot, got a few tattoos and probably tried to pick up “DJing” at least once over the course of your college experience.

You’re open-minded, however, and you think for yourself. You’re not afraid of what anybody thinks about you or the things you care about, which is why you hardly even made your ex hide his or her antichrist tattoo at the dinner table last Christmas.

You were “the less successful one.”

Your ex was better looking than you. He or she made more money than you. He or she had more friends than you – or followers, at any rate – and thus, his or her Instagrams got more likes than yours.

It annoyed the sh*t out of you, to be honest, and over time, you developed an inferiority complex of sorts. Nowadays, you don’t crave the most attractive person at the bar as much as you do the one who gives you the most attention.

The one who gives you the most attention. Gives you attention. You. You. You.

If your ex currently has you blocked on social media...

If you’re blocked from your ex across various platforms of social media, then, well, you’re clearly a passionate lover. You’re intense about all of your interests – and sometimes you’ll go a little overboard – but hey, it happens.

If your ex can’t stand to see your Facebook activity pop up on his or her mini-feed, the bottom line is, he or she clearly hates you. Now – while many will look at that as a negative thing – don’t be so shortsighted, my friends.

Science dictates "love" and "hate" are intimately linked within the human brain, so maybe he or she doesn’t hate you as much as he or she’s trying to get over loving you.

Or you’re just a psychotic mess with a questionable temper problem.