I have had my fair share of cheaters in the past, and while I underwent overwhelming amounts of sadness and self-loathing, I am much more aware now.
I am stronger, wiser and quite guarded. I can separate myself from my emotions with ease.
I now take a considerable amount of time to become invested in someone, rather than instantly diving in head-first.
I have reminded myself, day after day, that just because someone else may fail to see my worth does not mean it doesn’t exist.
Additionally, every guy who deceived me in the past eventually tried to win me back.
There were few I dabbled with, but every situation ended with me sticking the nail in the coffin.
Regardless of context, I have always managed to make amends with them.
Forgiveness has often been the catalyst of moving on for me.
Moreover, while I sincerely hope you don’t and definitely think you shouldn’t, you’re probably wondering why it’s okay if you cheat on me.
Well, this isn’t to say that I would take you back, because I definitely wouldn’t (having learned from my mistakes).
But, even if the slightest temptation tingles through your being, if you feel the urge to pursue some other woman, even just for a night or if there’s something she does that tickles your fancy more than I can, by all means, go for it.
Yes, go for it.
I say this because if there is ever a situation where you feel you need to pick between me and someone else, don’t you dare pick me.
If you choose to walk this road of infidelity, please do not turn back.
Acknowledge that you made this decision; consider that your feelings for me may not be completely authentic.
I have witnessed the thought process of several conscious cheaters, and I understand that they are usually acting on an underlying desire, one they could not attain through monogamy or just with that one person in general.
While cheating is obviously avoidable, we are all subject to personal changes over time that may influence our inclinations. We may become confused and not know what we want unless we try something else.
Perhaps cheaters feel they’re settling because they and their partners are growing in different directions.
Ultimately, our desires are something we can’t always control.
However, it is also important to note it’s not always your partner’s fault if he or she cannot fulfill your desires, (and he or she should remember that, too).
Whether we like it or not, though, sometimes cheating is just inevitable.
Cheating may mean you’re not ready for commitment or maybe, you don’t love me anymore, but most of all, it will imply that you and I are probably not right for one another.
Thus, I like to believe parting ways in response to cheating will only make us closer to the person or fate we’re actually meant to pursue.
While cheating would hurt me (and maybe you, too), as it has before, know I will eventually be fine.
Know that every day, I am becoming a better version of myself, with or without you.
Know I have a support system that will pick me up on my weakest days.
Know I will take countless helpful lessons from our experience together and be able to benefit from them.
Know I have faced strife much more difficult than this, and I still walk with my head high. Know that in the end, your honesty will set us both free.
Know that I know what I want in life, and a cheater will never be part of my plans.
Most importantly, I would much rather be alone than in bad company.
Furthermore, I am not an option; I am a choice. The right person will choose me every time, no matter what, and will not feel the temptation to commit an indiscretion of this caliber.
The right person may find someone else attractive, but will not feel the need to look further than me.
He or she will feel and appreciate the connection we have [more than] enough to not stray.
Even after a disagreement, this person will love me enough to want to sort out our issues rather than “winning” the fight.
But, most of all, he or she will be true to him or herself when confronting how he or she feels about me, and will never have to second guess it.
So, if you’re going to cheat on me, please move over for the person who won’t.