As Millennials, we're very social beings. We have multiple apps to share the different types of things going on in our lives. We use Facebook to express opinions and keep our families updated. We use Instagram to show off anything that looks good in our lives, from our eyebrows to our tacos. If we find something crazy enough that the world has to see it ASAP, but it's not long-term material, there's Snapchat.
You catch my drift.
So, with all of these ways to digitally express ourselves, I used to nag my husband because never posted about us. On the other hand, I spent a good 30 minutes coming up with the perfect post to share about our anniversary celebration. I would use holidays to show off the love of my life, and everyone seemed to enjoy being updated (since I usually have family on social media).
Even before we were married, he would post about certain things (like when he went to an amazing dinner), but never about us. I couldn't really figure out why. It sounds kind of invasive to ask why someone's not sharing pictures of you with his friends on social media, so I left it alone. I just never really understood it.
I always thought maybe it had something to do with our relationship.
"Maybe he doesn't want people seeing us," I thought. "But no, that couldn't be it." He used showed me he loved me all the time in public, and among our friends, he was very attentive and loving.
Well, he did post a picture of us twice, but that was it. When he didn't after, I just got really curious as to why. So, I went and asked friends, co-workers and family couples I knew who used social media, and I found out the same thing from everyone.
The women tended to post often about their relationships, and then men never did. I even started a few arguments by bringing this question up to them (sorry). But as it turns out, women just tend to share more personal things like relationships and big events. On the other hand, men barely used social media. If they did, it was only for really big, life-changing events.
Well, everyone, there is actually a scientific reason as to why your boyfriend never posts about you. According to a 2015 study, women use social media for connections with others, while men are more business-oriented social users.
Generally, females use social networking sites to make connections and stay in touch with family or friends. Men, by contrast, use social media to gather the information they need to build influence. Social media helps them perform research, gather relevant contacts and ultimately increase their status.
What does this have to do with your boyfriend not posting about you? Everything.
My husband posted about us right after he finished basic military training (BMT), as we had been apart for years. He also posted a picture for our wedding, but that's pretty much it. As it turns out, he doesn't really post on social media very much, anyway.
His last post on anything is from almost a year ago. He uses things like Twitter and Facebook to keep informed on news, but he doesn't feel it's necessary to share other details. We see our friends in person, and this gives us more to talk about at dinner, rather than seeing it on Facebook.
So pretty much, if your significant other doesn't post about you (or anything, for that matter), but shows you he loves you in every other way, you need to just let it go. He's probably not very social in the first place. He might spend a lot of time on social media because he's interested in whatever he follows (news, sports, funny dogs, etc.), but not actually posting about himself or his life very much.
If he's neglecting you, uses social media often and never posts about you, then maybe you should be concerned. Otherwise, just chalk it all up to yet another difference between men and women.