“That which does not kill us, makes us stronger,” as the quote by Friedrich Nietzsche goes.
Dealing with a sh*tty situation and going through a bad experience will make you more aware and more conscious of what you want in life. There’s a reason that saying has been around for so long; it’s tried and true.
And like the saying, when we date a douchebag, finally grow tired of being treated like garbage and dump his ass, we’re better for it.
Sure, we’re not devoid of scars after facing a relationship with a bonafide d*ckwad, but the scars we collect shape us in positive ways. No ferocious woman is without her battles.
By tearing yourself away from something toxic, your resilience is multiplied -- like building up a tolerance to a poison, you become incapable of being affected.
Walking away shows your grit. The very fact you had the fortitude to pull yourself out from underneath the cloud of douchebaggery shows you have it in you to survive and persevere. You should be proud of yourself.
Once you’re free and have taken your time to enjoy being single, you’ll be back on the prowl for your next boyfriend.
You can bet this time, your relationship will be different. You won’t make the same mistakes you made when you chose your last d-bag boyfriend.
What exactly are those mistakes you won’t make again?
1. You'll never miss another red flag.
Dating a douchebag will make you a bit jaded when you enter your next relationship. You'll automatically enter this new amorous encounter with a hint of suspicion.
You aren’t going to walk into a romance with open arms and zero walls up. While this may seem like a bad thing, it’s actually the best way to protect yourself while you take your time to figure out if you f*ck with this new guy.
2. You’ll never choose someone who acts like him again.
You’re not going into your next relationship without a clear understanding of exactly what you’re looking for in your next partner.
You just got out of a relationship with a person, who strictly embodies everything you’re not looking for. With him in mind, you can find his polar opposite. You know, a guy who doesn’t take two hours to get ready to go to the bar.
3. You won’t wait around for the next guy to screw you over for a second time.
F*ck me over once, shame on you. F*ck me over twice? Shame on me. You know now when a guy screws you over, he’s going to do it again. You don’t have time for that.
4. You’ll never date another guy just because he looks good on paper.
You won’t agree to date a man just because he is someone you think you’re “supposed to date” or someone your mom would probably approve of.
You won’t be with a man without that spark. Just because a person has aced the résumé doesn’t mean he’ll be a good boyfriend.
5. You won’t date anyone below your new and improved standards.
Your standards will inevitably become higher upon dating a douchebag. The next guy you date will blow that sucker out of the water.
You’re not looking to date another loser who doesn’t have his life together. It’s not sexy to live with your mom. The next man you date will be a man who offers you the world.
6. You’ll never date a guy who makes you feel small.
Douchebags are exceptionally good at tearing women down. It’s an art for them. Once you’ve been in a relationship where you’ve been belittled, you’ll never let it happen again.
You are a strong, fierce woman, and no man will make you feel less than radiant ever again.
7. You won’t date a guy just because he’s hot.
You realize looks really are only skin-deep and, on top of that, they fade with time.
Just because a guy is pretty to look at doesn’t mean he’s worth the relationship. Arm candy does not automatically translate to boyfriend.
8. You won’t date a man for his wallet.
Like looks, a man’s money is about as deep as his pockets. The ingredients for a healthy relationship cannot be purchased with a healthy paycheck.
You may have been OK with dating guys for free dinners, willing yourself to put up with their relentless, narcissistic chatter, but you can no longer stomach that behavior in exchange for a full stomach.
9. You won’t overlook the company a man keeps.
If a guy’s friends suck, he probably sucks too. Where you once ignored the obvious truth that his friends were a pack of pussy-chasing idiots, you’ll now take their behavior as a reflection of your man.
As my mother says, "You are whom you’re friends with."
10. You'll never ignore your gut again.
If he seems too good to be true, he probably is. If your gut is telling you something is off, you’ll choose to follow that feeling. Your intuition is a powerful indicator of a person’s character.
11. You won’t be blinded by the next time a guy says, "I love you."
You’ll take your next “I love you” with a grain of salt. He can’t just say he loves you; he’ll be forced to show you.
12. You won’t be naive when he says all those girls he's texting are just “friends.”
A douchebag always keeps a string of girls in his back pocket. You’re not going to fall for the same trick twice.
If he’s sneaking around, texting a bunch of other girls 24/7, he’s a shady mother*cker and you need to GTFO now.
13. You’ll never take yourself for granted again.
It’s easy to fall into a pattern of self-deprecation when you’re dating a guy who’s a piece of sh*t. You start to think that this is what you deserve, and you’re not worthy of anything better.
Once you’re free from that vile quicksand, you’ll never let yourself be enveloped like that again.
14. You won’t take things at face value anymore.
You’re never going to accept that things are always as they appear. When you’re looking for your next great love, you’ll be searching for something deeper, for something worthwhile. You’ll be looking for a soulmate, not someone to fill a time slot.
15. You’ll never again put your faith in someone who isn’t worth it.
You’ll never again give any part of yourself to a man who isn’t worthy of your heart.
Instead of trying to make a strong, fulfilling relationship out of something empty, you’ll search for a person who brings sustenance to your life and helps you to be a better version of yourself. The next time you love someone, it will be worth it.