Relationships

The Difference Between How Men And Women Tell Friends About Their Crushes

by Candice Jalili

Let's say you just went on the best date of your LIFE.

He picked you up at eight -- something you thought happened only to DJ Tanner on "Full House" -- and took you to a nice meal. I'm not even talking Olive Garden. No, he took you somewhere FANTASTIC. Like the best Mexican place in town -- because he remembered you're a sucker for a good margarita.

You found yourself genuinely laughing out loud at all of his jokes. Every time he touched the small of your back, it felt totally electric. You held hands on the walk home, and after you kiss him goodnight, he stopped to say he didn't think awesome girls like you actually existed.

You're not even halfway up your stairs when you're already thinking about the next time you get to see this guy. He just might be the real deal.

So now you that you've gotten back to your apartment, your roommates are dying to hear all about your date. But what do you tell them? Do you tell them about the electric touch? Do you tell them that it's only the first date, but you really already just know he's "the one"?

And what about him? What's he saying to his friends right now? Did he tell them that he just went out with an "awesome" girl like you? Did he tell them that he liked you so much that he went to the trouble of planning this date at a restaurant he knew you would love?

Well, you may not be curious. But I am. I am dying to know what aspects of their dating lives people are sharing with their friends and how much of it they're sharing.

So I decided to find out. I conducted my own survey of 75 respondents (31 males, 42 females, 2 unidentified) to get a better idea of what we're talking about when it comes to dating -- and with whom. Here’s what I found.

Who are we telling about our dating lives?

Both men and women agree that they're most likely to share their dating exploits with their closest friends. Women, however, are more likely than men to tell their coworkers about their dating lives.

What aspect of our dating lives are we talking about the MOST?

The female respondents' top three most-talked about topics are what the guy they're interested in looks like (81 percent), what she has in common with him (80 percent), and what she likes about him in particular (70 percent).

The male respondents shared the same top three topics of conversation, but their order was a little different. Interestingly, the number one thing men discussed with their friends is what they like about the person in particular (78 percent). This was followed closely by what she looks like (75 percent) and, finally, what the two have in common (59 percent).

Finally, while barely any male respondents (6 percent) said they would always talk about a date if it were GOOD, a large majority of female respondents (62 percent) said they always would.

Are we talking about the sexy stuff?

What if you have more than a crush on this dreamboat? What if he or she also gives you MIND BLOWING orgasms? Well, many more women (67 percent of female respondents) revealed that they would describe their sexual partner's aptitude in bed. Only 44 percent of men admitted to doing the same.

Are we talking about seeing a ~future~ with someone?

If you just went on the best date of your life and think you just met the man of you are going to spend the rest of your life with, DON’T FREAK OUT if he didn’t go gabbing to his friends about the three kids and the lake house you two lovebirds have planned.

It turns out that only 28 percent of men (compared to a whopping 64 percent of women) said they would talk about the relationship's potential with their friends. 

An even smaller percentage of male respondents (10 percent) said they would always talk with their friends about having a feeling of "just knowing" a girl is their soulmate. This number is startlingly small compared to 43 percent of women, who said they would always talk about that feeling.

Are we talking about being exclusive?

Okay, you had that good feeling, you two went on that good date, you had the good sex, and now you’ve decided that the feelings and the dates and the sex are SO good that this is the only person you want to do any of these things with.

Seventy-three percent of women report that they'd always share if they were being exclusive with someone. This is in stark contrast to the small 19 percent of men who say the same. In fact, 16 percent of male respondents (compared to 0 percent of females) would go so far as to frequently lie to their friends about being exclusive with a new lady in their lives.

So, ladies: Don’t be alarmed if your guy’s friends don't yet know that he is now officially porking you and only you.

Are we talking about being in L-O-V-E?

So you guys have been exclusive for a while, and now you’re in LOOOOOOOOOVE. That’s right. The L-bomb has been dropped, and you guys are officially crazy about each other.

Again, while most women talk about the L-bomb moment with their friends (51 percent of women do this), only 16 percent of male respondents said they would do the same. In fact, a quarter of male respondents confidently asserted they would NEVER talk to their friends about being in love. Almost none (5 percent) of the female respondents said the same.

Are we talking about MARRIAGE?

You guys are in love, and the next stop is the altar. But before the altar, there's one last step, and that's the moment you know you're going to spend the rest of your life with this person.

Less than half of both male (only 19% of male respondents) and female respondents (45% of female respondents) said they would always talk about marriage with their friends. I guess marriage is a little bit of a ~sensitive~ subject.