Relationships

Netflix And Chill: 4 Signs Your Relationship Is Desperately Lacking Passion

by Charlotte Barron

He may love you. He probably thinks about you all of the time. But the question is, what is he doing about it?

If you expect people to do for you as you do for them, you’ll end up extremely disappointed. Not everyone’s heart is the same size.

Now, before I begin, here’s a short disclaimer: Two people might be completely happy doing the bare minimum in a relationship to keep it going, and that’s fine, as long as both parties are happy.

But I firmly believe that when it comes to relationships, a lack of passion is fatal.

If you’re begging for attention from day one, alarm bells should be ringing.

Yes, sometimes affection and lust fizzles out the longer a relationship goes on, but if it’s lacking from the beginning (when it’s supposed to be the "can’t keep your hands off each other" phase), take the nearest emergency exit.

I’ve recently learned the physical side of a relationship is, quite simply put, non-negotiable. I’m not in favor of sickly public displays of affection by any means, and sex shouldn't be the only way to express affection, either.

For me, wanting to touch and be close to the person I’m romantically involved with is just natural, right from the start. Whether it’s kissing in bed in the morning, an arm around you while you watch TV, a hand secretly on your leg under the table at dinner or a simple kiss for no reason, these are all things that come naturally when you’re with someone you love.

Your affection lets someone know you want her.

It's exhausting to give all of yourself to someone who only gives you the bare minimum in return. You've given your heart and soul to someone, but you have to beg for his attention. You deserve to feel just as loved as you make your partner feel.

Some people may say they’re “just not affectionate,” and that’s totally fine (see disclaimer). But if you are affectionate, like me, think twice before accepting that characteristic in someone you want to spend a lot of time with. There’s only so much you can give before you start to feel like you’re kissing a wall.

“Oh, you look nice!”

Compliments are great, but my mom gives those for free. When you’re with someone you love, and you find her attractive, it should mean you can’t keep your hands or eyes off her.

Show her she looks great; don’t just say it. Look at her. Now, imagine another guy enjoying her, and you not meaning sh*t to her anymore.

Get your act together.

Take her out!

Yeah, Netflix and chill is great, but so is going out together and enjoying food in nice surroundings. Getting drunk somewhere is always a fun date night with the person you love, too.

I say I’m against over-the-top public displays of affection, but a little drunken kiss on your night out together never did anyone any harm.

Sure, watching Netflix and doing the grocery shopping is still "spending time together," but set aside time to go on old-school date nights to bars and restaurants as a couple, even if it’s just once a month.

He may love you, but is he proud you’re his?

Don’t be afraid of losing someone who doesn’t feel lucky to have you. Whoever you’re with should want to show you off from the very beginning.

Seriously, if someone is reluctant to hold your hand in public, raise it into the air and wave goodbye to him with it. Hold her goddamn hand.

Life is too short to be with someone who is scared to be seen holding your hand in public, so if that’s your situation, hold a glass of wine with it instead.

A relationship should be bursting with passion, excitement and desire. There are few things better in this life than to love and be loved in return, so when you have that, celebrate it.