What makes a healthy relationship?
There are a lot of theories out there, but none have yet to be proven. We go by judgment and gut feeling. And if that's still working after a while, we compare our two different personalities and assume we’re the perfect combination.
While we’re not exactly sure what combinations work best, we do know it’s important to achieve harmony. Love is all about balance, about finding that sweet spot between “two peas in a pod” and the law of “opposites attract.”
There are always going to be overlapping characteristics and weird similarities between two people. You can’t be completely different because then you’d never have anything to agree on.
I’ve found that successful relationships are ones in which you can enhance certain characteristics of your boyfriend while simultaneously adding your own to the mix. Your boyfriend helps balance out your one extreme side with his or her own extreme side.
There’s no filling in the gaps, just balancing the scale. You represent one side of the spectrum, and they represent the other. Those things that make you unique and lovable are the things that make you special and perfect for them.
There are a lot of different combinations that may or may not work with people. So instead of going off personalities, what if we went off the scales? What if the sign of a great relationship was how well you balanced the scale of two extremes?
You keep me safe; I’ll keep you wild.
This duo is common in relationships with a difference in years. You two take care of each other in different ways. There’s always one who exerts caretaker tendencies and another who promotes the excitability of younger blood.
The younger, wilder one shows you new things, reignites your passions and keeps you young, while the nurturer provides the rebellious one with the right amount of stability and support to keep the wild side under control but never completely locked down.
The nurturers are usually people who crave to feel the irresponsibility of their younger days, and the wild ones are people who’ve been searching for someone to ground them and keep them guided.
For the rebel, you feel like you have a safe space to unleash your wild side. For the caretaker, you finally have someone to open up your safe arms and expose you to a little bit of danger.
You keep me sane; I’ll keep you curious.
One of you is a bit more creative than the other. Maybe there’s one who is artistic and the other who’s more business savvy. The beauty of this recipe is you make the ultimate team.
You two have the perfect recipe for a collaborative duo. When one partner is constantly coming up with ideas and theories, the other is figuring out how to capitalize on those ideas.
You both crave the same experiences out of life, but your personalities give you the benefit of capitalizing on those experiences. One dreams of places to travel, while the other enjoys looking up hotels and flight prices to actually get you there.
You two really do share a mind -- and it’s the one of success.
You keep me down to earth; I’ll keep you searching for something more.
Maybe your boyfriend is rational, while you’re dreamier. You like to live in other worlds, and he or she likes to dominate the world.
While this seems like opposites, you both have the same core values and goals -- to have a better life. One of you is achieving this through the world you’re living in while the other is looking for it in another world.
What’s great about this duo is that you both strive for the same type of utopia, even if it’s through alternative ways. And when you finally get there, you’ll both be ready to settle down and enjoy it -- together.
You keep me calm; I’ll keep you nervous.
The beauty of the high strung and relaxed duo is that when both work together, they are able to achieve optimum balance. Someone who has lived in a bubble of calm their whole life will fare well to meet someone who adds some spontaneity and excitement in their life (even if there’s the rare occurrence of a panic attack).
When anxiety kicks in for one, the other is able to calm this person down. Finding someone who isn’t suffering from anxiety is crucial for an individual who is.
As for the partner who has always had a very calm and easy life, this person is about to realize there’s nothing more boring than being calm all the time. When both of you are at your peak, you’re enjoying the best of both worlds.