Breaking up is never fun. The entire situation is a tornado that mindf*cks you and leads you on a yellow brick road to hell.
Newly single, you're forced to trudge a path filled with lions, tigers and f*ckboys. On your way, you'll stumble across guys without brains, hearts and courage.
You quickly learn that those red, shiny shoes of yours are going to be your only friend for a while because you need to use them to take a step back from others in order to find yourself.
Sadly, not even the great Wizard of Oz can help you. You need to be a pilgrim on the journey of self-improvement.
Here are seven reasons you absolutely must walk your own path after a breakup:
1. After a breakup, guys want to fill the cracks of your broken heart with their d*cks.
Stay away from men for a while, especially those obvious and undercover f*ckboys. Men smell vulnerability like sharks smell blood, and unfortunately, sperm in the vaj can be salt in the wounds.
Be careful not to give a guy the benefit of the doubt because he might just want to be a friend with benefits. You're not stupid, and you're worth more than whatever he has to offer.
Ray Js always front like Kanyes, so don't be fooled. Respect yourself, and stay away.
2. You have to regroup and relearn who you are.
It's time to get your head back on straight and regain your independence.
You're no longer on a team, so you have to go back to the drawing board and come up with a new game plan: a new approach to your life.
Whether you like it or not, it's time to rewrite your future. So, sharpen your pencil and set new goals: read, work harder, wake up earlier, self-motivate, advance yourself for you.
At the end of the day, all you have is yourself, so strive to become the best version of that person. Plus, the more you get to know yourself, the easier it will be to determine what you want from someone else.
3. You need time to heal.
Breakups don't always just suck; sometimes they kill.
The sadness from the aftermath of getting your heart sledgehammered can pull you down like quicksand. The pain can be suffocating, but as long as you remember to reach out, you can make it out alive.
Reach out to your family and friends because they are the branches that will pull you out of your slump.
4. F*ck BAE. It's time for BAM: Before Any Man.
You should be the only person you put before anyone else. Society is stupid for believing otherwise.
Get excited to come home to yourself. Cook delicious dinners every night. Take long showers. Do your nails. Just take care of yourself.
You are a goddess, and this is your time to treat yourself as such. Treat yourself how you wish your ex had treated you.
Train yourself to get used to being pampered like a princess so you know not to settle the next time you go looking for your prince.
You only have a few years for you, and then a lifetime committed to your future family. This is your time, your only time, so cherish it while it lasts.
5. You should have adventures alone.
Life is a labyrinth: You can't see what's coming or where you'll end up, but you have to have the faith that you will get there.
Live each day for the story, not the ending. Make every day an adventure. Wake up with passion in your bones and electricity in your eyes.
Do what excites you and makes you happy to be alive: Travel. Write. Take pictures. Stick your hand out of the car window. Even if it's a small thing, just do something, and do it in your honor.
This is your life; it's happening now. Today happens once in a lifetime, so seize the day.
6. You have to learn to take responsibility for your smile.
Be the Commander-in-Chief of your happiness. You are responsible for the frown or smile on your face. You and you alone.
So choose what you allow yourself to feel wisely, and don't blame others for feelings you ultimately control.
7. You need to be grateful.
Be appreciative of the little things. Even though, you may have gotten your heart ripped out of your chest, you still have your eyes, ears, tongue and legs.
You were able to see the bullsh*t, hear the lies, voice your feelings and walk away from who mistreated you.
The situation was undesirable, but at least you had all you needed to leave and start again.
Surviving a breakup is rough, but it can be very empowering. You break down to rebuild, and when you no longer need the love of a man, that's when you'll be ready to receive it when the right one comes along.
The saying goes: “God bless the broken road that led me straight to you.” After you stumble, fall on your ass and scrape your knees a bit, you will find your person.
So do your time, little Dorothy. Walk your yellow brick road.
Focus on you because after you have a secure sense of self, and past all of the mindless, heartless cowards on your journey, your man will appear with a heart, brain and courage to match the set you've worked so hard for.