Right before you get married, suddenly everyone around you turns into Dr. Phil. They spew out advice about what marriage will be like, and how to handle the rocky times that will definitely swing your way over the years. But no matter if that advice is coming from family members, close pals or even strangers on the street, not all of it is advice you should run with.
Some of it — actually, most of it — is advice you should roll your eyes at and kick to the curb. Just remember, there are some lessons you need to learn yourself, no matter if that's the hard way, the easy way or just your own way.
Wondering what some awful marriage advice sounds like? Listen to these nine guys confess the worst piece of marriage advice they ever received:
1. Happy Wife, Happy Life
Every guy hears the line "happy wife, happy life." But, it's so stupid. It should be happy couple, happy life. Marriage means we're a team, and we need to work together and be on the same page. That's the goal. When people say the "happy wife" line to me, I just roll my eyes.
– Matt, 32
2. Always do what she wants.
An uncle of mine told me before I got married that I should just always do whatever she wants. I'm not about that kind of life. She's not supposed to be always right, and I'm always wrong. She's not supposed to be the one making all the decisions, like where we should go to dinner or travel. Marriage is about compromise; that's a better piece of advice in my opinion.
– Rick, 29
3. Be home every night by 6 pm.
My dad told me I should try to make it home every night by 6 pm, so me and my wife can have the night together and sit down and eat together. OK, that's not realistic at all. I just started at a new law firm. Some nights I'm there until 9 pm. I can't tell my boss I have to leave at 6pm on the dot to spend time with my girl. He'd laugh me out the door, permanently.
– Henry, 26
4. Say goodbye to your guys.
One of my married bros told me that when I get married, I should consider my social life dead. Like no more happy hours, trips to Vegas or nights out with the guys. But, like, why does it have to be that way just because I'm married? I think he's wrong.
– Nick, 29
5. Marriage isn't a natural thing.
A lot of guys I know now are anti-marriage. They're trying to tell me not to go through with it 'cause marriage isn't natural in this day and age. I found a girl I don't want to let go, and I plan to commit to her fully. Maybe they just haven't met their "one" yet.
– Tom, 28
6. You can always leave.
My brother told me that while I'm promising to be with her forever, I can always leave. Divorce is always an option. But to me, it's not. Or, at least it's not something I'm thinking about as an escape route.
– Aaron, 28
7. If she makes more, you'll feel less.
Some guys are threatened by a woman who makes more money than they do. My fiancée makes a lot more than me; she's a VP at her company. I always thought that was cool. Some of my friends told me it'll get to me eventually, and I'll feel shitty about it. I'm marrying her for many other reasons than the amount of money she brings home in her paycheck.
– Paul, 29
8. Just ignore her.
My dad told me whenever my wife-to-be gets a little carried away or dramatic to just ignore her. Maybe, like, get out of the house and not deal with it. I mean, come on. I've done that before, and it only gets worse when I come back. It's better to push through the fire and put it out immediately than turn your back on it.
– Greg, 26
9. She'll be just like her mother.
Her dad told me she'll probably be just like her mother, who he has been divorced from for, like, 20 years. He clearly can't stand her, and he told me all the bad qualities she has. I don't think my wife will be like that, and I don't think people grow up to be just like their parents. I don't think I am anything like my own dad.
– Casey, 27