It's tough to be confident in your body, especially when it's naked. For some reason, we all tend to point out our flaws when confronted by our nude reflections in the mirror.
For most people, our physical flaws outnumber the traits we're proud of, so I'm here to help you make your body look as good as it possibly can while naked.
Now, understand that you can't expect, after using these tips, to look like the Adonises we see on Instagram. That's just not realistic. These guys are jerks who make us feel like shit whenever we come across their heavily-liked images. To be fair, though, I'm sure these guys are great dudes and work very hard to look the way they do. I'm just being envious because it's easier than matching their physical prowess.
So, if you feel as though you could benefit from some simple tips on looking better naked, see what I've offered below. And hopefully she'll see you as the confident, shredded Chris Evans you know you can be. Sorry, I totally oversold that. Maybe Tobey Maguire in Spider-Man?
1. Adjust your diet.
If you have a romantic evening in the coming weeks that you want to look primed for, you can benefit from taking a look at your diet. Even the smallest changes can make a world of difference.
To avoid breakouts, eat Omega-3 fatty acids. These can be found in walnuts, flax seeds and salmon. For more youthful, glowing skin, opt for orange-colored fruits and vegetables like cantaloupe, carrots and sweet potatoes. But we're talking skin here. What you're really looking for is food for the body, right?
Well, if a better body is what you seek, steer clear of anything with sugar alcohols, such as sugar-free gum or candy. Gassy vegetables — like broccoli and cabbage — should also be avoided. On the day of your nude debut, cut carbs to a minimum and steer clear from fibrous foods like (you're not going to believe this) salad.
Other foods you should steer clear from? Foods high in fat that contain trans fats, white flour or sugar. Also, some people don't react well to dairy. So if you fit in that category, avoid that, as well. Instead, eat things like watermelon, pineapple, asparagus and avocados. For protein, opt for nuts, eggs and poultry.
2. Have a hot shower.
Do you notice that when you have a hot, steamy shower that your penis looks bigger? That's because the shower's heat promotes blood flow to the package, giving it a larger appearance (temporarily).
The warm water will also make your scrotum hang lower, which also assists in its overall larger appearance. But if a shower isn't in the cards, soak a towel in hot water and wrap it around your package, it'll deliver a similar effect. Promise.
A shower is also recommended for the simple reason that using a loofah gives your skin an overall brighter appearance as it gets rid of any rough, dry skin that may be lingering on your body. Make sure you tend to common dry areas like your elbows, knees, ankles and wrists.
3. Give your wiener a few tugs.
When in Rome, do as the Romans do. And by “Rome” I mean a porn set, and by “Romans” I mean male porn stars. Let me tell you, what these guys do to give their members a larger flaccid appearance works. In fact, it can add as much as an inch.
The method used is relatively simple, and involves gently stretching the penis with one of your hands. The trick here is to not get carried away when you're at half-mast; we want it to still look flaccid. What this tugging method does is welcome blood flow to the area, which is where your penis ultimately gets all of its confidence.
4. Work on your posture (and your confidence).
Stand tall with your shoulders pinned back. Don't slouch. This tip alone can rid you of a gut. Posture adjustments like these are all evident of confidence, something that cannot be faked.
To get more confident with your own naked body, you have to familiarize yourself with it. To do so, lock yourself inside (while home alone, that is) and parade around the place naked for the day. Study your reflection. See your body in various positions. Liberate yourself! Because, I mean, if you feel weird being naked alone, just imagine how weird you'll appear when naked in somebody else's company.
5. Take advantage of light sources.
Favor dim lights for a better appearance. Dim light sources (like a candle... romance much?) softens your features, and the flame adds a sense of mystery.
If you don't want to potentially burn your house down, dim the lights in your home or opt for a small light source, like a single lamp in a larger-sized room.
6. Get some sun.
If working out isn't your bag, at least get a tan. You don't have to bake for hours in the sun, just sit out casually for a little bit. That does the trick. You can buy tanning lotions that give a tint to your skin without looking orange, as well.
These are disguised as moisturizers, so you don't have to feel weird when buying or applying. The lotions cost about 10 bucks, which is a small price to pay for physical supremacy.
7. Fit a workout in.
The best body parts to work out when you're about to get naked are your shoulders, chest, lats and arms. Perform two exercises of three sets per body part. By working these muscles, you create the aesthetic V-taper that can be found on those statuesque models on Instagram that I envy so damn much.
8. Groom your damn self.
If you're lucky enough to get naked with a woman, the first thing you should take care of is your body hair. I'm talking all of it. Trust me, man-scaping is the easiest way to shed a few pounds fast.
Since they're most important, let's start with your genitals: Get rid of all ball hair (I mean it) and trim your pubes so they're no longer than an inch. You don't want to look pre-pubescent, here.
As for your body, get rid of any and all back hair because it's just gross. Next, create an optical illusion with your body hair. Use this hair to your advantage, dude!
To do so, trim your chest hair and clean up the hair on your stomach, leaving a trail from your chest to your genitals. This style creates a T-shape that influences the appearance of broader shoulders and a slimmer waist.