If You Really Want To Connect With Someone Then The First Date Should Cost Zero Dollars

by Paul Hudson

Dating can be insanely expensive. The drinks, the food, the attractions… all of it costs a pretty penny. And for what? For the rare possibility that the person is worth it? Pointless.

When it comes to dating, the first date in particular, it’s wiser to not dish out money if you can avoid doing so. The point of a first date is to get to know each other and to have a good time, neither of which requires money.

Why not try a new strategy for your first date and leave your wallet at home?

Whatever your purpose, you can achieve it without spending money.

Are you looking for a long-term relationship? Are you looking for a husband or wife? Are you looking to have a goofy, fun time? Are you looking to get laid? Whatever your reason for going on a date, you can realize it without having to spend any money.

Think of it as a challenge: How can you get what you want in the most cost-efficient manner? How can you get her to drop her panties or him his boxer shorts without spending a buck? How can you get him or her to fall in love with you without having to whip out your wallet?

Nothing is impossible. Challenge yourself.

Chances are neither of you has ever been on a penniless date. Think of the memories.

I don’t know about you, but most of the dates I’ve been on haven't been very memorable. Not because I didn’t have a good time -- I’m sure I did --, but because they weren’t unique. I would do the same dinner and drinks as always without ever getting too creative.

Creativity shouldn’t be reserved for what goes on in-between the sheets. Try something new on the first date that will guarantee to make it a memorable one. Besides, if you do end up together for the rest of your lives, it’ll be a hell of a story.

You can’t hide behind your money; you’ll have to put forth the effort.

Human beings in general tend to excel under pressure. When we have to come up with creative solutions to problems, we almost always manage.

The problem with the way most people date is that they date as if it were a chore. They go through the movements without ever bothering to give the whole experience meaning. You can’t find someone to love if you don’t make an effort to impress.

Most people assume that the best way to impress someone is by throwing around money, yet it rarely does the trick. Throwing your money around won’t get you what you’re looking for. In fact, it’s likely to get you exactly what you aren’t looking for -- unless it’s a one-night stand, of course.

Some people aren’t worth your money.

When it comes to first dates, you don’t yet know the other person very well. We throw enough money into the trash as it is, on things we don’t need and often don’t bother using. Don’t make the same mistake when it comes to dating.

Why spend money on someone with whom you may not even end up hitting it off? If you’re looking to be a philanthropist, there are much better causes to which to donate. Wait until you know that someone is worth your time before you dish out your hard-earned cash.

It’ll help you understand the other person’s motives.

The truth is that some people are only looking for a free meal -- it’s just the way it works. You may be okay with feeding someone who is capable of feeding him or herself, but if I’m going to feed the hungry, I’m going to make sure they actually need the help.

If I’m going on a date, the only motives I’m interested in are centered on if she wants to hang out with me because she enjoys my company and conversation, or if she wants to go a few rounds in the bedroom. If she is looking for anything else, I’m not her guy.

Not throwing money at the situation will help you figure out what someone is looking for, real fast. Like small talk, money creates more friction between you and the goal.

It’ll remind you that there are more important things in life than money.

When was the last time you had an amazing time without spending any money? Maybe even somewhat recently. What about the last time you had a great time with someone else without spending any money? Probably less recent.

This isn’t to say that it isn’t possible; we just assume that when we are with another person, we need to be taking out our wallets. The truth is there is plenty to do with other people that doesn’t require you to spend any money. It may seem foreign to you, but with a bit of effort, you can enjoy your first date more than you would if you were to cover a several-hundred dollar tab.

In fact, you’ll likely have an even better time on your date if you don’t spend any money as you’ll be forced to engage in real, genuine conversation.

For More Of His Thoughts And Ramblings, Follow Paul Hudson On Twitter And Facebook.