There's A Scientific Reason Everyone You Know Is Breaking Up Right Now
Unless you’ve been too wrapped up in your Instagram and Twitter feeds, I’m sure you’ve noticed that all of your obnoxiously coupled-up friends are suddenly single or on the way to being single right now.
Break-up season is upon us.
Of course, it has to do with how f*cked up we are about dating, definitely.
Average modern relationships statistically last just two years and nine months. So much for forever!
This is directly correlated with a high use of social media. An overwhelming amount of ex-couples surveyed listed social media as a reason their love didn’t last.
So, while you’re busy proverbially f*cking your Facebook page, your Facebook page is literally f*cking you over. Technology is relationship poison.
According to Hannah Green, a researcher at OnePlusOne: “Spending time together and communicating well with your partner is of great importance for building healthy and lasting relationships.”
You’re single because you put more value on likes than actual love.
Now, while it seems obvious spending all your time online instead of giving your partner attention is not the best way to promote relationship bliss, there is another reason you’ve felt so inclined to swap monogamy for singledom as of late: the weather.
This has probably happened to you before. Think back on your (probably tumultuous... it’s fine we’ve all been there) dating history and consider the times of year in which you were in a relationship.
You were single in the summer most of the time, right?
There’s a reason for this. Cuffing season is over. We’re unsatisfied with what we settled for back in November, and now we’re ready to sow our wild oats out in the sunshine.
We no longer need a cuddle buddy.
We no longer feel the social pressure to pair up, and we’re finally back out on rooftops and at brunch looking to get some ass.
It’s summer, baby. Suddenly, everyone is single and ready to mingle.
Why does cuffing season happen?
Dating coach, Tracey Steinberg told MTV:
…When things get cold in November to March, everyone is in 10 layers, and most people don’t want to be running around outside. So it’s nice to have someone to snuggle [and] drink hot chocolate with.
The short answer is we don’t want to be lonely. Being alone sucks, so we snap up the first nice boy or girl who looks our way and make him or her BAE in the blink of an eye.
Winter is for hunkering down, not hooking up.
We're subject to nature.
It all really comes down to nature. Charles Darwin’s classic “survival of the fittest” ideology basically sums up why we’re so into getting into relationships when it starts to get cold.
Darwin said if you were a weirdo who liked to walk around in the cold by yourself, you were less likely to survive and procreate, whereas those who found mates during colder months had a much higher chance of remaining alive and making babies.
Since you are naturally more equipped to survive as a singleton when it’s warm out, it’s no wonder you’re more likely to be out on your own.
We're taken in the winter and single in the spring.
According to Gurl, a new love is exactly like being on drugs:
We actually get a high from being smitten. We have more energy. We lose our appetites. We don’t sleep enough, and we feel goal-oriented -- in that we want our goal to be to win over and spend all our time with the guy or gal inspiring that high.
So, when we find love, we’re ecstatic. We’re on an emotional roller coaster, literally wasted on these feelings of delight.
Everything feels so good that we rush into relationships unabashed.
The perfect time to do this is when the weather starts to get cold, so we have someone to keep us company.
The average time to break up is after three to five months of dating, once the butterflies stop flapping and the romance fades.
This also means if you’re getting hot and heavy with your SO in October, you’re likely to be over it by March, just in time for summer.
We’re outside more.
Nothing makes you want to be outdoors more than a beautiful, warm summer day.
Gone are the days of hermit life with only your basic boo and Frank and Claire Underwood to keep you company.
During the summer, you’re out basking on terraces and mingling at rooftop bars. It’s easier to meet people and to shop around.
Not to mention everyone is wearing minimal clothing and showing off the summer body he or she spent all winter perfecting.
We’re in a better mood.
Being out in the sunshine will scientifically make you a happier person. The sun boosts your levels of vitamin D, which helps to boost your energy levels.
The summer makes you more active and energized; therefore, you’re more likely to go out looking for love instead of opting to stay indoors. With summertime comes optimism.
Plus, everyone knows when you’re in a good mood. You’ve got sex on the brain, and when you’re having a lot of sex, you’re definitely going to be in a good mood.
We get restless when the seasons change.
While during the cold winter months, all you want is someone to share your Ben and Jerry’s and watch “GOT” with you, when the world outside starts to thaw and the sundresses and sangria comes out, you just want to get out of the house and do your own thing.
Once you start going out regularly with your SO, as opposed to being stuck inside, you start to see what that person is about in a whole new light.
It may suddenly become apparent that this person isn’t an avid bruncher or beach goer.
Perhaps he or she isn’t about spending evenings on rooftops or weekends in Montauk. All of your differences will suddenly become very apparent.
Suddenly, he or she starts to feel like more of a burden than a comfort.
You can feel your boyfriend or girlfriend weighing you down when you just want to be free to live. You’re restless, and you want to get out into the world and explore it.
If you’re going to break up, it’s best to do it when the weather is favorable.