Relationships

6 Reasons Anyone Ready For A Real Relationship Won't Play Games

by Vered Cohen

We’ve all experienced the exciting feeling of finally meeting someone special.

You seem to have so much in common. You spend hours talking and getting to know each other.

But when you finally gather the courage to show interest in making things serious, he or she suddenly takes a step back.

It has happened to me.

When I took his hint and backed off, he tried to contact me again.

I’m not going to lie: I did enjoy this thrilling game playing in the beginning.

The anticipation definitely boosts your adrenaline.

However, after a while, it simply became exhausting.

Eventually, I couldn’t stand this any longer, and decided to completely ignore him. I wanted to quit the game.

It seems most people find romantic game playing exciting.

I often hear my friends admit, “He didn’t text me back, but you know what? I like it. I like that he’s not obsessed with me.”

I always raise an eyebrow in return and wonder out loud, “How is showing interest being obsessed?”

I usually receive the same answer.

Flirting should be thrilling.

This can be true in some cases. But I have come to realize that usually, game playing is actually more tiring than thrilling.

Here are six reasons you should consider ditching the game playing:

1. Early disappointment is better than aimless anticipation.

If you truly like the person and want to take it to the next level, why shouldn’t you?

Just be straightforward about your intentions.

It's rather frightening to expose yourself to potential rejection.

But if the other side doesn’t feel the same, discovering it early on will save both of you hours of pointless, nerve-wracking games.

2. Sending mixed signals won't get you very far.

Don’t get me wrong; I don’t recommend revealing all your cards right from the start.

But there’s also no need to send mixed signals or force him or her to read between the lines.

Some of us are more awkward and shy, and we might find flirting extremely frustrating.

This shouldn’t bother you.

You can easily make the person notice you’re into him or her without being too obvious or ambiguous.

Just be yourself.

Remember: No matter what kind of reaction you get, it’s not the end of the world.

In the case you don’t get the desired reaction right away, don’t be discouraged and don’t jump to conclusions.

Maybe he or she is just shy.

Interestingly, it’s very easy to mistake a shy guy for a game-player.

Certain guys really don’t intend to play games. They’re just too scared to make the final move.

Yes, as far-fetched as it sounds, he might be flirting and teasing you precisely because he’s afraid of rejection.

Some men are just like Mark Darcy in “Bridget Jones’s Diary:” quiet, shy and sometimes, a bit pretentious.

But once they open up to you, they will be amazing partners.

3. If the guy is playing hard to get, maybe it's not worth it.

I do think most game players only want to do one thing: mess with your brain.

Some of them find it amusing and exciting.

They are eager to send you a message, but will wait a few days just to nurture their “hard-to-get” image.

They will flirt with you and then talk to you in the most platonic manner.

If a guy you like treats you this way, you might want to reconsider the whole thing.

These are many times clear signs he’s just not serious about you.

It doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you or doesn’t find you attractive, but he’s probably not planning your honeymoon together. If you aspire for anything more, just move on.

4. Time is a precious resource.

We only live once, and every moment of life is precious.

Don’t waste too many of them on speculations and assumptions.

If the person is not showing interest, he or she better make room in your head for the lucky person who will.

5. Stepping out of your comfort zone will only make you stronger.

I'm usually a shy person.

But growing up, I learned progressing in life is totally worth challenging my shyness.

Even if it doesn’t end up like you expect it to, stepping out of your comfort zone is crucial for your personal growth in all aspects of life.

This is a good opportunity to discover how powerful and brave you really are.

Most of us have hidden powers we're not aware of.

6. Being somebody's rebound is not my cup of tea.

Perhaps it’s not at all about you. Perhaps the person hasn’t gotten to that point in his or her life yet.

Guys are usually a bit immature, and would much rather play video games and hang out with their friends than spend time with a serious romantic partner.

It could also be the person just got out of a relationship and sees you as a possible rebound.

In that case (unless you’re looking to fool around), don’t waste another minute.

You deserve better.

I think I deserve better.

That is exactly why I decided to ditch this game playing for good.

Yes, it can be exciting. But trust me, very quickly, it will drain you of all your energy.

The new me will take the forthright guy over the mysterious guy any day.

Life is way too short to pussyfoot.

Be honest. If he’s serious about you, he’s not going to back off.

In fact, he’ll appreciate it.