Actions Vs. Words: The Difference Between A 'Nice' Guy And A Kind Guy

by Paul Hudson

Not all guys are complete assh*les. Most of them probably are but not all. There are nice guys out there -- tons of them, actually. The only problem is a “nice” guy is really only an assh*le in disguise.

He’ll come off as being a sweetheart, but when it comes down to it, he always has his own agenda. He never really cares about you more than he cares about what you can do for him.

Nice guys are only nice because they understand it’s easier to attract bees with honey than with vinegar -- and that’s about as far as their reasoning goes.

They don’t care about you because you don’t mean much to them. Of course, they will never admit this. Nice guys are the ones who will deny their agendas until the end, possibly even believing their own lies.

Being nice is only righteous when it’s backed by genuine kindness. When a person is kind, he or she may not always be nice, but he or she does make a much better partner.

If you’re looking for a “nice” guy, then you may need to rethink your approach. Instead, find yourself a genuinely kind individual. Those types of guys will actually stick around for when it matters most.

A nice guy will tell you you’re beautiful; a kind guy actually believes it.

Nice guys like to tell you that which you like to hear because it wins them points in your eyes. The truth is flattery often does wonders. Of course, it can’t be over the top, but telling people nice things can get you pretty far in life.

Kind guys, on the other hand, aren’t worried about getting further in life -- at least not by spreading words they don’t necessarily believe in.

If a kind guy tells you you’re beautiful, tells you he cares for you, loves you, he’s saying it because it’s something he feels he needs to say, because he means it.

A nice guy has excuses for the promises he breaks; a kind guy won’t make promises he won’t be able to keep.

Nice guys always make promises, regardless of whether or not they plan on keeping them because they know you want them to make you promises.

When they don’t deliver, they simply come up with a great excuse as to why they can’t keep the promise. You, being love struck, will most likely forgive them. Win-win for them; lose-lose for you.

Kind guys, on the other hand, only make promises when they plan on keeping them. They’d rather disappoint you now by telling you they can’t make it than to disappoint you double when they end up breaking that promise.

A nice guy does things for you because he knows you’ll return the favor; a kind guy does things for you because he wants to.

I have to reach out to Kant for this one: “Always recognize that human individuals are ends, and do not use them as means to your end.”

Nice guys do things for you only because they know you will return the favor. They’re using you to get what they want. Sure, you’re only returning a favor, but it’s the reasons behind why they are doing things for you that matter most.

Kind guys will do things because it benefits them, just like every other man -- they’re only human.

When it comes to those closest to him, however, a kind guy won’t use you for his own ends. He will do things for you because he genuinely wants to better your life, make it more pleasant.

A nice guy will promise you the moon; a kind guy will simply make sure you’re happy.

Nice guys are those who always tell you things will get better and your life, as a whole, will one day improve.

The problem is these are only empty words. He may even want to make a better life, but he isn’t doing anything to make that change a reality.

Kind guys may promise you a better life, but most importantly, they are working to make that better life a reality. They won’t promise you the moon unless they plan on throwing a lasso around it.

They love you and don’t want to disappoint you. If anything, they’ll promise less but accomplish more, surprising you and making you happy.

A nice guy will be there for you when it’s convenient; a kind guy will inconvenience himself for you.

Nice guys are always around when you don’t need them but never around when you actually do need them. They’re there when it’s convenient for them to be there, but when something is out of their way or unpleasant for them, they’ll be unreachable.

Kind guys are there for you when you need them, always. They care about you and your wellbeing -- sometimes even above their own (if they love you).

Kind guys will inconvenience themselves for you because to them being inconvenienced isn’t really inconvenient.

A nice guy is nice to everyone; a kind guy may be an assh*le to the rest of the world but always treats you with respect.

Nice guys wear a mask for all to see; it’s part of their act. They are nice to everyone because they want to be able to ask everyone for a favor at sometime in the future.

Kind guys may not always be the most approachable. They may not always be looking to be everyone’s friend. When it comes to those they care about, however, they’re sweethearts.

A nice guy is weak and pretends to be someone he's not; a kind guy is stronger and comfortable in his own skin.

Nice guys are nice because they feel they need to be in order to get ahead in life. They understand people like nice people because they feel safe around them.

Kind guys don’t need to be liked. They don’t really care whether the world hates them or not because they know themselves to be good individuals, kind individuals.

They aren’t looking for anyone’s approval because, quite frankly, they don’t need anyone’s approval.

A nice guy will tell you he’ll love you forever; a kind guy won’t need to say a word

The nice guy will lead you on to believe the most grand of untruths. They will convince you they love you -- maybe even believe they love you. But when things get tough, they will be the first to jump ship.

Kind guys love you for much more profound reasons. Kind people can only love kind people -- it’s just the way it works.

It’s not easy finding kind people you’re also attracted to. If he’s kind, and you can feel he loves you, don’t worry if he hasn’t told you. He’ll treat you like you’re the most amazing woman in the world without saying a word.

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