"I’m doing this for those out there that haven’t been able to share who they truly are with their loved ones."
Some serious congratulations are in order. Demi Lovato came out as non-binary in an Instagram video on May 19. Lovato explained that they came to the realization after a period of self-growth. “Over the past year and a half, I’ve been doing some healing and self-reflective work,” they said. “And through this work, I’ve had the revelation that I identify as non-binary.” So happy for them!
“I’ll officially be changing my pronouns to they/them,” Lovato added in the emotional video. “I feel that this best represents the fluidity I feel in my gender expression, and allows me to feel most authentic and true to the person I both know I am and still am discovering.” Lovato also announced that they would be honing in on this process of discovery with a new podcast, 4D With Demi Lovato, which will feature “conversations with special guests about identity, creativity, activism, philanthropy, and beyond.”
The first episode was released on May 17, and in it, Lovato gives a closer look at their coming out journey. (I totally understand if you need to take a break now to go listen. I’ll be here for when you get back!) Throughout Lovato’s conversation with guest Alok Vaid-Menon, an acclaimed gender non-conforming writer, performer, and public speaker, they discuss how Lovato’s emotional wellbeing and mental health suffered before coming out.
During their conversation, Vaid-Menon recalled the first time they met, when Lovato attended one of Vaid-Menon’s poetry readings with Sam Smith. Apparently, Lovato was incredibly moved by the show, and asked Vaid-Menon afterwards, “Oh my gosh, is being non-binary when you are healed?” Though Lovato did not remember that exact interaction, the experience of seeing Vaid-Menon perform stuck with them as well. “There was a visceral reaction in me that was screaming, ‘This resonates with you,’ and it was the first time in so long that I heard someone else speak my truth and then realized, ‘Oh, that’s my truth too.’”
But it was not always easy for Lovato to live as their most authentic self. “In 2018, when I overdosed, I feel like the reason why that happened was because I was ignoring my truth,” Lovato told Vaid-Menon. “I was suppressing who I really am in order to please stylists or team members or this or that or even fans that wanted me to be the sexy, feminine pop star in the leotard and look a certain way. Now, I just realize it’s so much more important to live your truth than to suppress yourself because that’s the type of stuff that happens when you do.”
Moral of the story? Always live your truth – and support others doing the same.