Hopeless Romantics Read At Your Own Risk: Why 'The One' Doesn't Exist

by Anna Rubin

Throughout our lives, naïve romantics tell us that “when you find the one, you just know.” We allow ourselves to get wrapped up in sappy Nicholas Sparks movies and trust that one day we will meet that one person who will change the whole course of our lives. That in some way, our existence on earth will be more important after we meet this person. Well, apologies to the hopeless romantics out there — I’m calling your bluff.

I’m the first to admit that when I see "A Walk to Remember" will be on television, I prepare myself with a glass of wine and a box of tissues. (And if you try to say that you’ve never even thought about shedding a tear during that movie, you’re obviously a liar.) However, it's not the message of “true love” or “soul mates” that jerks the tears from my eyes.

Don’t get me wrong, I think all the people who await Prince Charming to come sweep them off their feet have a nice idea in mind regarding what love should be like. But I don’t believe that this can only be achieved with one, sole person.

I believe that there are many people out there for me who would make great matches. If you have been in love more than once, then you are a testament to this — and if you’ve been in love even just once, you’re an example as well (you will find love again). There are hordes of people who have loved and who will find love again in their lives.

And even though two people may have chosen to move on without each other, it does not mean that they couldn’t have made it work. Rather, it just means they chose not to continue. Love is not a dream that lifts you into a fantasy — sometimes it seems fantastical, but it’s also truly difficult at times. It tests your patience, your pride and sometimes, even your compassion. But, I truly believe love stories don’t have to end if ample effort is supplied.

I have been in love: I have felt love’s wrath, but I’ve also felt love’s elation. There is no greater feeling than to love and be loved.

The one thing I can promise you is that nothing is perfect. So, to all the hopeless romantics out there rolling your eyes, try setting your standards at a reasonable level. Give people the chance to surprise you. In order to be open to love, you must be open with yourself.

Photo via Fvantasy Tumblr