Freedom Of Choice: Why Seeing Multiple People Is The Way To Find The One

by Ai Len Nguyen Phan

For most of us, one of our life goals is to find that special person to be with for most of our lives.

We meet new people in hopes of finding a connection that goes beyond just friendship, but it is never easy. We encounter various types of people daily, but that does not mean they are the right partners.

Being able to feel something romantically for a person is sparked by the commonality we might find with the person, the physical attraction, the personality and the chemistry.

Even then, when we meet someone who seems right, it does not always work out the way we want, due to internal and external conflicts. And due to this obstacle of finding the right person, this might be why our generation reclines to just dating, instead of committing to someone.

Relationships can be complicated and might not work out in the end. We are afraid of being vulnerable and getting our hearts broken, so to protect ourselves, we just date around.

Dating and being in a relationship are two different things, but some people might still find it confusing or difficult to differentiate between the two.

A relationship has a key ingredient of commitment, once two individuals decide to not see anyone else romantically; whereas, to date someone typically means you like the person, but you're not fully ready to just be with him or her because you want more time to see if the person is worth the commitment.

That's the wonderful thing about dating: It gives you space, control and options.

Within the dating world, it is not necessary two people have to just see each other and no one else (unless they have chosen and agreed to do otherwise).

It might seem unfair to date multiple people at the same time since you might not be able to fully focus on one person, or the fear that it might show that you cannot commit to just one person.

You should never feel locked down when you are still in the dating phase, but at the same time, it would be a respectful thing for you to inform the individuals to prevent complications that might arise later on.

Dating is a period for you to explore your options. When you are seeing multiple people at the same time, you will be able to see which person is right for you.

Maybe the first few weeks of being together, you feel like that person seems like good relationship material, but after a few months, you might change your mind.

Or it might be the opposite: You might not like the person at first, but after a while you begin to like the quirky things he or she does.

Dating multiple people does not mean you are a player or just want some fun; it just means you have the ability to choose and control who to be with because you deserve the best.

We are human beings and are not perfect, which is why we are constantly seeking the special someone to fill up the gaps we are missing.

Unfortunately in this world, we have to go through a series of relationships and a few broken hearts to get to "the one." Fortunately in this world, we have the options of dating.

It does not require the full commitment a relationship requires so it can help us from getting hurt, and it gives us a chance to meet multiple people without feeling tied down.

With dating, you are able to experience difference things with different people at the same time. By doing so, you are able to compare each person.

In that process, you learn more about yourself (what you like, what you look for in a partner), and sometimes, you are able to find Mr. Right instead of being in a relationship where you have devoted so much time, effort and energy, only to figure out he or she is not the one.