Relationships

What Every Man Should Know About Dating The Hard To Handle Girl

by Emma Fath

Perhaps you've had exes tell you you're hard to handle. Those same exes say they put effort into the relationship, but it wasn't reciprocated.

Perhaps you've been in the early stages of a relationship and your partner has called you out for not coming up with date ideas. You apologize.

Here's a kicker: A friend tells you you're probably hard to date because you're so ambitious. Pick your jaw up off the ground; the flies are coming in.

All signs here point to being a bad girlfriend. Run away as quickly as possible.

When men enter relationships with women of our nature, they aren't going to know we've been holding onto these scars and that they affect us in budding relationships. Such scars remind us every day of the potential failures we may be in dating.

For those who date women like us -- women who are hard to handle -- here's what we want you to know:

We try to stay balanced

We are not a workaholics. We commit ourselves to our passions: love, family, friends, creativity and work.

Maintaining these balances means a lot to us, so having them in our lives will make us feel fulfilled and at peace.

Even though we love our significant others, our bond can't be the only one we cherish in our lives.

You will not want to be around us in 10, even five years, if there's no balance in our lives.

Sometimes, we feel the need to prove we are not trophy wives

We are the girls who dream for ourselves. We know we don't want to be dependent on our significant others financially, so we are probably going to resist sacrificing our careers or promotions for you.

We are still proving to ourselves that we have what it takes to do what we want. We want to be your partner, not your dependent.

Maybe this is pride getting in the way, but we need to remember to keep ourselves, even when we love you.

Love our spirit and we will love coming home to you

We love you for your passions and the way you smile when you are happy and how you get serious when you think about your work. We love that about you and hope you love that about us.

Love the spirit in us and we will love the spirit in you.

You can trust we will not run off and cheat on you

When we say we will stay, we stay. We are probably the most committed people you know. We may put too much faith in people, but when we like you, you should not expect us to go running off with someone else.

We picked you because of the way you make us feel. Other things will take our time, like family, friends, hobbies and work, but not another partner.

The girls who may be hard to handle are the girls who are trying to handle themselves. They don't need you; they want you.

You enrich our lives, but we fear what will happen should you say goodbye. While we may be hard to handle because we get caught up in our passions, making time for others or having a lot to say, remember, what frustrates you about us may also have been the qualities that attracted you to us in the first place.