Relationships

Why You Should Always Date The Person You're Afraid Will Break Your Heart

by Emily Garcés

This generation has glamorized the idea of not caring about anything, especially when it comes to relationships.

We play all types of games. But why? Because, supposedly, we don't care about the other person we're messing around with.

That leads us to Tinder to find a random hookup just to fill the void that is being alone. The "I don't care" attitude always comes back to bite us in the ass because, deep down inside, we want that special someone. We just always put up a front.

Good job, Generation-Y.

The reason most of us act like we don't care is because it's a defense mechanism; we want to feel like we have control. We don't want any human to think their presence has too much of an impact on us.

So when we don't get the text we're hoping for, we assume we won't be talking to that person anymore and that leads to a cycle of silence.

The idea of caring freaks us out because we make ourselves vulnerable, and hearts can be broken when we're vulnerable. From all the love stories and personal experiences we have been exposed to, being heartbroken does not look like fun.

Who wants to be in a blanket burrito with a hurting heart while eating ice cream all day? We would just prefer the eating ice cream part.

Hate to break it to you, but the person you fear will break your heart is exactly the person you need to go for.

This idea sounds like plan for failure, but here's why you need to fall for the person you're afraid will hurt you:

1. It'll keep you in check.

You need to care when it comes to being in a relationship. How else are we all going to make a relationship last if we act nonchalant about it?

You'll end up with a bunch of cats (or whatever animal) with that kind of attitude, and ain't nobody got time for that. (Unless that's your goal, in which case, keep doing you.)

Once we break down our barriers and allow someone into our lives, magic happens. People can make us do weird things, and finding a special significant other we know can break our heart, it transforms our minds.

This single human will keep us in check because we value them so much, we don't want them to go anywhere. The games we play will be long gone.

Unfortunately, it has to come down to us fearing they will break our hearts for us to make us take our feelings seriously, but if they're all we want, then we let it be.

2. You put in an effort to keep the relationship strong.

Relationships die out because people give up on making them work. There is no spark, no passion, no nothing.

Neither of the partners cares whether there is a concerted effort made. When someone out there fascinates you, there will never be any second guessing as to whether you should put in an effort to overcome obstacles and make relationships work.

We want to reassure our SO they're important to us at all times.

3. Challenge accepted.

Our generation has been taught to not care about anything, but we should care about our relationships.

Dating someone we care about takes us completely out of our comfort zones. We will be doing things we never did for anyone else, and that's how you know you have a keeper.

This whole concept of dating someone who has the power to break your heart isn't so much about the heartbreaking part, rather it's all about this person being different.

It's scary to know you're in it so deep with someone, but that's what finding love is about — it's all or nothing. There's no way a relationship can continue if there is no change or growth from the source itself (aka you and your partner).

You don't want to be stuck in the mud with someone, you want to venture off into sublime happiness with them. So let it happen.