I've never been married, so I don't know a whole lot about weddings. But as far as I can tell, planning a wedding looks like a whole lot of stress and DRAMA. First, you have to grapple with the whole "coming to terms with spending the rest of your life with this person" thing. Then, there's the fact that you have to plan an entire wedding. THEN, on top of it all, you have all this outside pressure to look like your "best self." And one woman is all too familiar with this pressure. Bride-to-be Cassie Young shut down body shaming when a personal trainer reached out to her on Facebook with aggressive attempts to try to make her look like her "best self" in time for her wedding day.
Cassie shut the trainer down hard and screenshotted the messages as a PSA to all that true happiness doesn't come from your appearance. With the screenshots, she wrote:
You are worthy. Love is out there for you. Life is waiting with open arms. It doesn't matter if you're skinny or fat or between the two or willowy or broad shouldered or peer shaped or like a board or anything in between. You get good stuff in life by being YOU. That's what matters. If you think of life as a 'game' with being skinny as how you 'win,' this guy is offering to play by the rules and get you there. I'm telling you the game is BOGUS. You don't need the game. I reject the game. I REFUSE TO PLAY. It's a fake construct that you can step outside of. Your inner-value and self-worth comes from YOU, not what you look like. Who gives a f**k if you got a few extra pounds. Or ten. Or twenty. Thirty. Whatever. If you are happy and healthy, that's ALL that matters. Those pounds DO NOT DEFINE YOU OR YOUR WORTH. Don't let people like this try to convince you otherwise, because they'll try - but it's because they don't understand yet. They're caught up in the game and can't see it for what it is. You can. Life is waiting for you. It's too short to be spent worrying about a belly roll. Go be happy and live it to your fullest.
Among the trainer's most terrible remarks? "You can accept how you look but you can't be happy with the way you look. You can't lie to yourself." Another infuriating one? "You can be happy with your life and your loved ones and you can love yourself but still hate the way you look." But throughout it all, Cassie kept her cool and shot this body-shamer down with class.
Check out the full post with the infuriating screenshots below:
As you can see, Cassie first politely shut down his request with a simple, "I am in shape! Thank you so much for the offer, though." Instead of letting it go, the trainer just kept pushing her. But she didn't let the trainer walk all over her. No, instead, she held her own ground and showed him that under no circumstances would she stand around and let someone try to bring her down like that. And one of her messages to this personal trainer really hits the nail on the head in terms of what we should all remember:
When you're wrapped up in what other people think of you, it can be so hard to be happy with your body because of people consistently commenting on it or trying to convince you that it's bad. Once you see the truth — that it doesn't define you or devalue you — you'll realize that being fat doesn't have to be this looking cloud throwing shade every time you look in the mirror. It's just an adjective. Blonde. Tall. Petite. Fat.
Unfortunately, in the type of world we live, there are going to be all sorts of types of people who try to tear you down. But in those cases, look to people like Cassie Young for some advice on how to handle the haters like an absolute pro.
Check out the “Best of Elite Daily” stream in the Bustle App for more stories just like this!