We all have that one f*cked up relationship that we constantly look back on. It started as the purest of puppy love, and then went to sh*t. After some crying, overanalyzing, whining to your friends, and of course, a couple nights on the couch with Ben & Jerry, it’s time to move on.
It is understandable to fear the past repeating itself, but people everywhere need to stop letting past relationships define their futures. At a certain point, you need to get up, dust yourself off, and keep moving forward. Some say it takes either half or double the time you were in a relationship to get over it.
Make it half by following the these steps:
So your ex cheated? Was jealous? Your ex didn’t magically pass on all his undesirable traits to all the guys around you. Don’t rule out a new guy without giving him a chance, first.
Stop Playing The Victim
No matter how much your ex hurt you, at some point, you let it happen. In a way, people are like dogs. If you don’t correct their bad behavior, they will keep doing it over and over again. Take control over how you allow others to treat you. And, without a doubt, you did some things that really pissed off your ex, too. Nobody is perfect.
Don’t Sell Yourself Short
Stop using phrases like, “I was this way, so he did this.” Don’t blame yourself because someone else turned out to be a sh*tty person.
Keep It In Your Pants
Please do not explode out of the post-relationship slut closet. Despite popular belief, the best way to get over a guy is NOT to get under another one. While it may work for a little, ultimately, it will do no good. Plus, no one wants to deal with your baggage anyway.
Focus On The Good
Stop being bitter. No matter how much the breakup hurt, it was a learning experience. Because of it, you are a better and stronger person.
You may not be ready to start dating again, and that’s okay. But, don’t waste your youth obsessing over your ex. In the words of the ultimate gal pal, Carrie Bradshaw:
“Maybe the past is like an anchor holding us back. Maybe, you have to let go of who you were to become who you will be.”
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