For a relationship to really work, the people involved have to be more than just partners or lovers – they have to be best friends.
Best friends have a special sort of relationship. They have a relationship that is more understanding, more lenient and more flexible than most.
Best friends have a deep care and respect for each other, yet they understand – unlike many of those within a relationship – that they do not own the other.
Most relationships fail, and they do so because the people never see each other as true equals, but rather as possessions, as means to an end.
If you want to know what chances you and your lover have of lasting together, then all you have to figure out is whether or not he or she is your best friend. If your partner isn’t, then ask yourself why not.
Here are 10 signs to help you figure things out:
1. Your partner is the one you go to with all your problems.
The fact is that you trust your partner more than anybody else in the world and feel comfortable enough to share all the things that have been bothering you. When you have a bad day, you go to your partner. When you’re having trouble with something you’re working on, you go to your partner.
When someone treats you badly, cheats you, screws you over or disrespects you, you go to your partner. This person is your safety blanket.
2. You have more fun with your partner than with any of your other friends (sex aside).
Our best friends are the people we enjoy spending time with the most. They are the people whom we instinctively float towards.
We don’t so much plan on hanging out with them as we already know that we will be – because we always have fun. If your partner is the person who entertains you more than anyone else, then your partner is also your best friend.
3. You don’t feel the need to hang out solely with your partner, but you prefer it when he or she is around.
We all spend time with our partners – usually more than with friends. However, when you begin to feel that you’d prefer it if your partner were to hang out, even if part of a larger group, then it’s a good sign that this person isn’t just your partner and lover, but also your best friend.
You may have no problem hanging out without him or her, but in the back of your mind, you know that you’d have more fun if your partner would join the festivities.
4. The two of you have more inside jokes than you can count.
If you can look at each other and know exactly what the other is thinking, if you burst out laughing at things that no one else understands, if you have self-created phrases and words that no one else is privy to, then you've found yourself a lover and best friend.
5. You share many of the same hobbies.
Best buds get along as well as they do because they have so much in common. They say that opposites attract, but not so much when it comes to best friends.
Best friends are best friends because they relate on so many different levels. They share likes, dislikes, hobbies and habits.
6. You have debates on just about anything you can think of.
Although the two of you may share many of the same hobbies, you most likely don’t share many of the same opinions. Best friends are best friends because they have a lot to talk about – or argue about.
7. You don’t fight too often, but when you do, neither of you take it to heart.
Friends argue. Best friends argue and never take it personally. Best friends allow things to roll off their backs because they know how important each is to the other.
They don’t get mad over the little things because they know how hard it is to find someone whom they care about so much. Many relationships fail because they are incapable of just this.
8. The two of you are more than comfortable doing just about nothing together.
You love doing things together, but don’t always need to be doing something in order to enjoy each other’s company. You’re fine with simply "chilling." You can go for walks. Talk. Eat. Drink. Or just sit and reminisce.
It’s really all about comfort. Your best friend is the person you are most comfortable around – the person you know is never judging you.
9. Your partner is the one you go to for advice. Best friends are incredibly important because they help us get through life unscathed.
They help guide us and help us make wiser decisions. It can be difficult to make an objective decision. Our closest friend is one of the only individuals who we may trust to give us advice on life’s most crucial decisions.
Your partner knows you as well as you know yourself – you trust this person to make the right decisions for you.
10. You laugh and smile more with your partner than with anyone else.
If your partner makes you happier than any other person in your life then he or she may very well be your best friend. It’s really all about love – not just the romantic kind.
If you love your partner in all the ways a person could possible love another person, then your partner is just as much your best friend as he or she is your lover. To feel this kind of love is to experience true love – the deepest and purest of all loves.
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